Facing Your Fears

Facing Your Fears

Episode Description

Fear is powerful. It can cause us to avoid problems, people, and even opportunities in our life. But it can also be overcome. In this episode of Mind Your Mind, host Tim Unsinn speaks with Falan Johnson, a therapist at Dakota Family Services, about the function of fear and how to face it. Learn where fear comes from, how to identify it, and how to calm down and build confidence when you’re feeling afraid.

What to Expect

  • What is fear?
  • How our body reacts to fear
  • How to respond to fear


Resources: Learn More

Things to Think About

  • If you can’t face your fear all at once, what are some ways you can gradually expose yourself to it and build your confidence?
  • Are you avoiding something in your life because of fear?

About the Hosts

Falan

Falan Johnson provides therapy for children, adolescents, and young adults ages 7 - 25. She believes it is her job to meet clients where they’re at and provide services specific to their needs. Falan is honored to be a positive change agent in the lives of people who come into her office. She believes in a holistic approach, not only considering the person as an individual but as part of a greater working system. Falan earned her master’s degree in Social Work from the University of North Dakota. She is certified in Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR).

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Transcript
Facing Your Fears

Featuring Falan Johnson, LCSW, Dakota Family Services

Tim Unsinn:

Welcome to Mind Your Mind, a podcast presented by Dakota Family Services, an outpatient behavioral health clinic located in Minot, Bismarck, and Fargo, North Dakota. In this podcast, I will talk with our experts about understanding and nurturing our mental health and wellness. I'm your host, Tim Unsinn. Join me each episode as we explore the intricacies of our minds, decrease the stigma of mental illness, learn practical tips for managing our mental health and wellbeing, and recognize when it's time to ask for help. Join me now to mind your mind. Welcome to this episode of Mind Your Mind. Our guest is Falan Johnson. Falan is an outpatient behavioral health therapist on the Fargo campus and provides outpatient therapy for children, adolescents, and young adults. Falan it is great to have you on mind your mind, our topic, facing your fears. However, before we get to the topic, one question we ask all of our guests before we start, and that is, why do you do what you do?

Falan Johnson:

Well, thanks for having me on, Tim. It's the connection with the clients and getting to be a part of that positive change.

Tim Unsinn:

Great, love that. Our topic now is facing your fears. So I'm thinking of lots of different types of fears. However, there's gotta be a function to fear. What is that?

Falan Johnson:

Excellent question. I think a lot of the times when we experience fear, it tends to be an emotion that we don't like. We want it to go away. So if we can think about where that fear comes from and what is its purpose in the first place, that can make it a little easier to sit with. So the function of fear is to alert us. It's to get us ready. Well, at its most basic level to run or hide, but essentially to escape danger or a threat when our body is in a fearful state. However, we also get some positive aspects to that. Like we get heightened awareness. Our physical performance is optimized, and it's a driving factor for motivation and ambition as well. So if we can try to focus more on that side of things and use the fear as fuel, so to speak, that can be helpful.

Tim Unsinn:

Alright, so we, we know that fear has a function and there are different types of fear. So I'm thinking that, are there different types?

Falan Johnson:

Well, I would definitely say yes, there's different types, right? But at a physiological level, our body's gonna process it pretty much the same way. It's gonna hit the amygdala. The amygdala's gonna say, Hey, there's a threat. We need to act now. And then your nervous system is going to respond in ways that it has escaped danger in the past, successfully, usually by running or hiding.

Tim Unsinn:

Okay. Yep. So we realize fear is happening. Where do we start to maybe come down from that fear?

Falan Johnson:

So sometimes the fear and that physiological response is going to be very much needed, right? So like in the case of a, of a grizzly bear, you are going to want that adrenaline boost so you can run away in other scenarios where maybe we're experiencing fear about a confrontation we have to have with a family member, it's not gonna be particularly helpful to run away or hide from that situation, right? The fear typically only gets bigger. So if we've identified that there's not an actual physical threat or danger to our safety, the first thing we wanna do then is get calm. So calming the nervous system. Some easy, straightforward ways would be deep breathing, maybe some guided visualization or some progressive muscle relaxation. Anything we can do to bring the system back down, because when we are experiencing an intense state of fear, we actually are not thinking from the decision making part of our brain.

Falan Johnson:

It virtually shuts off. So that's why we wanna get calm so we can make decisions with our whole brain again. So get calm, do some relaxation, some deep breathing, and then name the emotion. When we name the emotion, either out loud or just to ourselves, that lets our nervous system know, Hey, I know what this emotion is and I know what to do with it too. So that's also gonna add to some calmness. I think the next part then is that just kind of turfs into creating your action plan. So <laugh> the thing about fear, right? It, it triggers us to want to escape. Like I said, if we've identified that there's not a threat that we actually need to escape from the way to make that emotion go away, then is to do the opposite, is to just lean in, move forward, get involved, and go towards whatever it is that is scaring you. Easier said than done sometimes.

Tim Unsinn:

I think back to, depending on what kind of fear it is, the fear of the, the animal seems to be it's, it's right in front of you, you gotta deal with it. Family issues, you know, we tend to kind of push those aside and push 'em aside. Face it just like you do the grizzly, get into it.

Falan Johnson:

If you can just rip the bandaid off and go for it, that's gonna be the, the quickest, most effective approach. Sometimes that's gonna be too much too soon and it's gonna, it's just gonna kind of override and we're gonna go into freeze and that's not helpful for anybody. So in situations like that, creating an exposure plan, so creating smaller moments where you can face that fear a little bit at a time. So back to the example of a confrontation within your family. Well, if confrontations are difficult for you in general, maybe you start with confronting somebody that you feel more safe with to practice with. Maybe you start with a smaller confrontation. Say you ate your mom's lunch and she was really looking forward to it, right? So maybe practice there first before going into opening up childhood trauma, for example.

Tim Unsinn:

Right? So go practice some family confrontation before you go for the big one,

Falan Johnson:

<Laugh>. Yeah, I mean, kind of, yep.

Tim Unsinn:

Yeah, that's a great way to warm up I guess to the big picture. So at least you've got some confidence going in.

Falan Johnson:

Yes, I'm glad you used that word. The whole point is you wanna build confidence and tolerance to be able to sit with the uncomfortable emotion. So again, that's where that little bit at a time is gonna be helpful. I think it's also <laugh> important to remember. We tend to want to avoid. If we can avoid avoiding, that's gonna be key. At the end of the day, there's this quote that goes, avoidance is just prolonged suffering disguised as safety. That's been helpful for me, I know is when you, when you really think about it, the avoidance doesn't really get you anywhere. We think it does.

Tim Unsinn:

Right, right. That's a great quote. Well, as we start to wrap up talking about facing our fears, you covered a lot of ground, so we'll go with that. Yeah, that was a lot of information and as always with podcasts, I really appreciate the fact that we can pause, rewind, listen again, because there's always so many little, little bits and pieces in there that we can take and use on our daily life and share with others. So again, thank you so much. Before we wrap up though, you know we've got that final question we ask all of our guests, and that is how do you personally mind your mind?

Falan Johnson:

Lately I will say getting outside. Just getting outside and taking in my environment and trying to be in the moment.

Tim Unsinn:

Perfect. Thank you Falan. Appreciate your time and talent with us here on Mind Your Mind. Thank you for joining us for Mind Your Mind, a podcast presented by Dakota Family Services. You can't have health without behavioral health. Remember to mind your mind. For more information, links to additional resources, contact information, and much more. Go to Dakotafamilyservices.org.

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