Christy Wilkie provides therapy for children and adolescents, ages 5-25, who have complex behavioral health issues. She combines her extensive clinical expertise with a belief in kids, and has a unique ability to find and develop their strengths. She works hard to be an ideal therapist for her clients, doing what is best to fit their needs.
Lucas Mitzel provides therapy for children, adolescents, and adults, ages 5 - 30. He believes building relationships with clients is the most important piece of successful therapy. He loves what he does because it allows him to walk next to people he would never have met had he chosen a different profession, as they work to make amazing life changes. He has the honor of meeting people at their worst, all while watching them grow into the people they’ve always wanted to be.
Featuring Christy Wilkie, LCSW, and Lucas Mitzel, LCSW, Dakota Family Services
Announcer (00:00):
This episode of Is It Just Me, is brought to you by Dakota Family Services, your trusted partner in mental and behavioral health. Whether you need in-person or virtual care, the team of professionals at Dakota Family Services is dedicated to supporting children, adolescents, and adults in their journey to better mental health.
Christy (00:21):
Disrupting life patterns and life routines that aren't serving you.
Lucas (00:26):
It's how we feel that keeps us going.
Christy (00:29):
You can be a masterpiece and a work of art all at the same time.
Lucas (00:40):
Hey everyone, I'm Lucas.
Christy (00:42):
And I'm Christy.
Lucas (00:43):
And you're listening to the Is It Just Me podcast where
Christy (00:45):
We aim to provide education, decreased the stigma, and expel some myth around mental health.
Lucas (00:49):
Christy, is it just me or did the summer just go way too fast?
Christy (00:52):
It is not just you. It went way too fast.
Lucas (00:55):
I hate this <laugh>.
Christy (00:56):
Why are we here? <laugh>? Why are we here at the end of the summer already?
Lucas (01:00):
Oh my God.
Christy (01:01):
How did this happen?
Lucas (01:02):
I don't, well, just one day goes after the other and then eventually we're here
Christy (01:05):
As timed does. <Laugh>. Wow. The insightful comments today, <laugh>.
Lucas (01:11):
And we're, this is gonna be a good one. This is gonna be a good one.
Christy (01:13):
We are on fire already.
Lucas (01:15):
Do you find that this is like one of the more stressful times of year though for everyone?
Christy (01:21):
Yes. And I remember when I was growing up, my mom, when the 4th of July would come, 'cause I was a lake kid and we just loved it. We you spent all summer looking for the 4th of July and she'd always be like, well, summer's half done. I was like, oh no. But it's kinda like she's not wrong. I know. You know? So it's like we're on the other half of the 4th of July and it's like, ugh, this just went way too quickly.
Lucas (01:43):
Way, way too fast.
Christy (01:44):
But it's, and I think it's the, the first part of the summer is people enjoying the summer and being like, oh my gosh, we're outta school. And the second part is kinda like, oh, school's coming, big changes happening in the fall. Yeah. And it's like people are at the point right now that they're starting to get a little bit more anxious.
Lucas (02:00):
Yeah. I'd say, at least for me, and I think everybody else would agree with this, that the two busiest times of year for us is the end of school and the beginning of school
Christy (02:10):
For sure.
Lucas (02:10):
And there's a million reasons for that. But obviously the biggest reason is all of the giant transitions that people are doing.
Christy (02:17):
Right. It's not just going to school. Right. It's going to school, it's going off to college. It's huge. Life transitions for parents, for kids that are going to be adults. I mean every, like, I think sometimes we forget, like when you're little to go to the next grade is like a big deal.
Lucas (02:35):
Yeah.
Christy (02:36):
It's huge.
Lucas (02:36):
It is huge. And not, we can't forget to mention just like simply we are transitioning then into a different season as well. And there's a lot of anxiety that can come with come with that. Like we've talked about seasonal affective disorder before. And how, I have a lot of clients who give very stressed anticipating what's gonna happen this year. And how we're gonna get through it. Right. So there's a lot of stress going on right now.
Christy (03:00):
Everywhere you can feel it, it's palpable.
Lucas (03:03):
So I mean we could, there's a lot of topics that we just said that we're gonna try and cover, but why, let's start, maybe we'll go from youngest to oldest.
Christy (03:12):
Look at us
Lucas (03:13):
Try to be organized. Yeah.
Christy (03:15):
At least one of us does. <laugh>. That is the truth.
Lucas (03:18):
So why do you think going back to school for like K through 12? Yeah. Why, why is that stressful?
Christy (03:23):
I'm gonna say for, well actually this is probably true for K through 12. It's the unknown. I mean, that's anxiety in general. Right. But you get people who are anxious. The thing is they don't know what they're getting into. And so it's kind like the anticipation of going into a classroom that you don't know with kids that you don't know, with a teacher that you don't know. It's like you don't know the expectations of your teachers. Your professors. If you're going to college and if you're a parent, you don't know how your kids are gonna respond to those new environments too. That's, it's huge. And it's a change in routine.
Lucas (03:53):
Huge change in routine.
Christy (03:54):
And we kind of go with the summer, people would get a little willy-nilly <laugh>,
Lucas (03:58):
You got there, good job.
Christy (04:00):
I took a minute. <laugh> with the bedtimes and wake up times whatever. And then you go to school and if you don't practice those routines. Yeah. That is a, that is a rough transition into the school year.
Lucas (04:11):
Yeah. I've got a few kiddos that they really struggle at the end of the year because they go from tons of routine to no routine. And then they go from no routine to tons of routine. And so those are two, I mean that's, those are big deals. And like you said, there's a lot of new things happening. And depending on what part of your like academic career that you're in right now, like it could be you're changing schools. altogether. Maybe you moved. And now beginning of school year is even more stressful. The transitions from elementary to middle and then middle to high school are always really big. And then like every year in high school that they get closer to being a senior gets a little bit more stressful.
Christy (04:51):
Or excited. I mean even, but even with the ex, like some people, some people get really excited about some of those things. Not everybody is like, oh my gosh, this is terrible. Like, some kids really love being in school because they do thrive on the routine and they do really need to know what happens next and have expectations set for them. And that's great. Some kids do not. And so I think it goes down to really getting to know your own child and what they need. Because kids are just not the same.
Lucas (05:17):
Are there, do you feel like there are certain mental health diagnoses that maybe, for lack of a better phrase, like kind of flare up during this time? Or we just need to maybe have a little bit more care with
Christy (05:28):
Yeah. Most mood disorders. I mean, anxiety is the biggest one. I think that just kinda goes depression also, just depending on, you just don't know. Like you don't know what's gonna trigger it. And it's if, if you go, like you go into a new classroom and it's all of a sudden you're with all these kids that you're perceiving don't wanna hang out with you or you don't fit in. Or some grades are really tough. Middle school is tough.
Lucas (05:52):
Middle school sucks.
Christy (05:53):
It's just Wow.
Lucas (05:55):
Yeah. It's, that's a lot.
Christy (05:56):
It is. There's just a lot going on in middle school. <laugh>, it just is. I think that there's just a lot of friend stuff and social stuff that happens that causes a lot of distress.
Lucas (06:07):
Yes. Yeah. I think that there's so like obviously general anxiety, generalized anxiety can flare up quite a bit. But separation anxiety is a big one that we see, especially with elementary school age kiddos. And just that if you have for teachers who are home all, all summer long and then they go back to school and now their kids are separating, like there can be a little bit of a, for lack of a better phrase, like regression in, in that ability to separate, which can be a challenge for a lot of families can cause a lot of distress. The best thing you can do, and I think we've talked about this in our anxiety episode, but the best thing you can do is just drop 'em off. They're safe and then you leave. Just let them because they're gonna stop like really soon after you leave.
Christy (06:53):
There are, I mean, and there are things that you can do leading up to that too. Like we always, depending on the kid, like go practice. Go practice dropping. Practice a drop off, walk 'em into the school, let them walk into the school before anybody is there before all of the overwhelm and anxiety is there. So they know that routine of going to school, dropping off, walking in, like they can do it. Build up some mastery before they have to do it with an audience.
Lucas (07:20):
Yeah.
Christy (07:21):
I think anything, any the, the pre-teaching is invaluable.
Lucas (07:28):
Well 'cause anxiety is all about being, uh, worried about the unknown. So if we can remove the unknowns, then you're gonna feel better going into it. Right. So like with, uh, high schoolers walk your classes. A lot of the, one of the biggest worries that I get or most common ones is what if I get lost? Or what if I don't make it in like the three to four minutes that I have in the hallway. To a kid that seems like zero time and they don't realize how long an actual minute is.
Christy (07:56):
They can't even check their text messages in that time.
Lucas (07:57):
So walking, like timing that, walking from class to class to see what do you actually have time for that. And really what it probably comes down to is you just don't get to stand in the hallway talking to your friends. Um, which is kind of the point of the three minutes. <laugh>.
Christy (08:12):
Most kids that go to high school end up graduating and most kids aren't tardy. So there's something about that schedule that works. It's weird. If most kids can make it on time, then you can too.
Lucas (08:27):
Right. Go through worst case scenarios. So try and figure out what the worries are and then, okay, so what if that happens, what would you do? And a lot of times it's funny to me, just because I've been doing it for a while, but they always have the answer <laugh>. And, uh, they just didn't think about it fully. They stopped at the worry and didn't move forward. They didn't finish the movie as an analogy that I like to use.
Christy (08:50):
Close that loop.
Lucas (08:50):
Anxiety being the, uh, the trailer to the movie. And it, it doesn't tell you the ending. So finish the movie and then, uh, you'll feel better. If you can handle worst case scenario, everything else is gonna be pretty easy.
Christy (09:01):
Right. It's amazing. Even when they, when they try to think of worst case scenario. I mean, there are some, there are some people that they, they really can come up with a pretty significant worst case scenario. But even most of the time, the worst case scenario ends up being relatively manageable in some way.
Lucas (09:16):
Yea. Absolutely. And the ones that just 'cause you brought it up, the ones that are like severe worst case scenarios, is that even reality, right? Like would that happen? Chances are if it's that bad, like where if I go to school I might fall down the stairs and die or something like that. That's not totally as a real situation that Yes, I talk to somebody about have you ever fallen downstairs before? Does that happen to you regularly? Like, are we really worried about that? Well, no. Okay. Well so it's probably not gonna happen.
Christy (09:43):
Right? Yeah.
Lucas (09:43):
So it's finding out what those worries are and then helping them face it.
Christy (09:47):
Just because now we're here, I'm sorry we're in a rabbit hole at the beginning of the school year and throughout the school year, but there's a lot of drills. Oh, okay. Fire drills. I don't know what they're call, I don't know what they call, they call 'em code something now. I don't even know what they call them, but like, they have to practice going under their desk or locking the door. You know, those kinds of things. And it's, I mean, that causes significant distress in kids. And I think, I think most schools have gotten better about not just not doing them unexpectedly. Yeah. Like they put 'em on a schedule and they kind of give kids a heads up, especially if they have a heads up that a kid is maybe a little bit more anxious. But I tell you, those drills cause significant distress for young anxious kids. Well, maybe even older anxious kids. I don't know.
Lucas (10:31):
They don't call 'em lockdown drills anymore?
Christy (10:34):
Maybe they do. I don't know what they call them.
Lucas (10:35):
I don't know. They're changing stuff all the time. They change how they do basic math now. I don't even know how to do it. Oh my gosh. I didn't know how to do it back then. I definitely don't how to do now.
Christy (10:43):
I didn't know how to do it the way that they're teaching me. I sure don't know how to do it the way that they're teaching them.
Lucas (10:48):
Oh my goodness. A lot of the, uh, worries that I get with kids is also related to social anxiety. So like, especially with elementary school kids or middle school kiddos, they don't have vehicles. They don't get to see their friends maybe as often. And so they've gone three months without their friends. And so it's like, well what if my friends don't like me anymore? What if I don't have any friends anymore? And it's, I've never seen that actually happen. Um, but it is a very common worry that I hear and it's just important that you talk through those things like we're saying. But it's also really important that even if it's seems like that's ridiculous to us, it's not to them. So make sure that you validate, you validate, validate, validate.
Christy (11:31):
I think the other thing too is if, if you've gone the summer, and I mean a lot of kids have phones now, but if they've gone the summer without seeing their friends or whatever in those, in those few weeks before school, get them back in touch with people. Get them back in touch with, with the friends that, that you know that they're gonna be around. Or if, you know, when you start to know who's in their classrooms, get 'em connected with some of those kids so that there's a familiar face when they, when they go back there. Because this is another I just saw, I just saw a kid today that I hadn't seen since school and I think he grew a foot. I mean, kids change, they change the way that they look. They just change so much so fast. That it's like over the course of a summer, like someone can become almost unrecognizable. Let's make sure that we know what these people are looking like. I was like, geez, you wearing stilts today, kid <laugh>.
Lucas (12:17):
Some of the other worries that I hear would, oh, what if my teachers not nice? What do my teachers mean to me? Or what if I can't remember my locker combination is another really popular one.
Christy (12:28):
I going back to the, this my kid I was talking to today. He's talking about being worried that he had a strict teacher and he's an anxious kid, so he follows the rules <laugh> because that's how it manifests. And I was like, the worst thing that could happen if you have a strict teacher is that everybody follows the rules. And it decreases the chaos that happens in your life, which is actually really good for you. <laugh>. And he was just like, oh yeah. Yeah. That's a good point. It's like, yeah. Strict teachers. There's not, when you got a teacher that like will stick to a routine and make sure that things get taken care of, that can ease a lot of anxiety rather than actually, because they're, if you're worried that your teacher's strict, you're probably not the target market for who she's gonna be strict with.
Lucas (13:12):
And a lot of times kids will use strict and mean, uh, synonymously. But another way I'll help kids think about it is, well, why, why do you think teachers get mean? And it's always because somebody's breaking the rules. Um, do you break the rules? And typically, like Christy just said, kids who are worried about this are the rule followers. And they're like, well, no. Okay, so then they're not gonna be mean to you. Right. Or how many teachers have you had? And this works, obviously, the better the older the kid is, the better this works. And how many mean teachers have you actually had? So what are the chances of that actually occurring? Or how many times has a teacher actually been mean to you?
Christy (13:46):
Right. I blame movies.
Lucas (13:48):
Yes. Movies are a big part of this.
Christy (13:50):
The portrayal. Just like these mean terrible ogre like teachers, especially elementary school teachers are like the bomb, like the most friendly. Energetic, wonderful people. It's, you're not, there's just not many mean teachers in the elementary education era.
Lucas (14:09):
With like locker combinations. So we're getting into like middle school to high school level now. Like practice that with them. Even just, I have drawn a little dial on my whiteboard and I just taught them how to do like three turns to the right, two turns to the left and go straight to the number. And even just talking about that alleviated a ton of anxiety 'cause they're like, oh, I can do that. That's easy. Yeah. Or what happens if I actually do forget it? Well, you just go to the office and they just help you out with it. Like it happens all the time.
Christy (14:37):
And they'll give you a pass. Like, you're not gonna get kicked out of school if you can't get into your locker. Right. You know what I'm saying? Like they think that, they think that, I mean that's a, or or it's an embarrassment thing where it's like, well, everybody else is gonna get their stuff together and I can't and then I'm gonna be late into my classroom and everybody's gonna be looking at me. And I was like, dude, I promise you teenagers are so egocentric, they are so worried about themselves that they do not care. They just, they're probably just glad that it's not them that's going in late. <Laugh>.
Lucas (15:05):
They're just trying to survive too. Yeah,
Christy (15:06):
Exactly. Everybody's just out there fighting their own battles.
Lucas (15:09):
So funny. Everybody who's anxious is always worried that everybody's looking at them while everybody else is worried that everybody else is looking at them.
Christy (15:14):
Exactly.
Lucas (15:15):
So they're all just focused on themselves <laugh>.
Christy (15:16):
Right. And it, it's just, they don't think about it like that. Right. But when you kind of can point out the cognitive distortions, like, because they, they're like, nobody likes me. Nobody cares about me. It's like, if nobody likes you and nobody cares about you, why is everybody going to be watching you walk into a classroom and being like, oh, look at them. It's like, no, you can't. Both things are not true in this case.
Lucas (15:39):
Yeah. Like, I mean this in the best, most loving way possible. You're not that big of a deal.
Christy (15:43):
You're right. <laugh>
Lucas (15:46):
Other than high school, the most, probably the biggest worry that I get from high schoolers. So if parents, if you don't know this, they are worried about this, where am I gonna sit or who am I gonna sit with at lunch? It is the most stressful part of like the first week of school.
Christy (16:00):
Do you know how much time in general throughout the year I talk about lunch.
Lucas (16:05):
It's so much
Christy (16:06):
The social dynamics at lunch are just wild. So much so that a lot of kids will skip lunch and not eat because it causes them so much distress. So if that's the case snacks, pack snacks for for kids because you can't go throughout the whole day not eating. That's not good for your brain. It's not good for, it's not good for anything. It's not good for your mood. Hangry is a thing.
Lucas (16:27):
Absolutely it is.
Christy (16:28):
So if you have a kid that's skipping lunch, always make sure that there's some snacks. But that's like my first question is who eating lunch with?
Lucas (16:34):
Yeah. 'cause it's a big deal.
Christy (16:36):
Or even getting lunch, like the act of getting lunch and this is K through 12. Yeah. Like going through the hot lunch line, huh? That is stressful for a lot of people. Like, what if I drop my tray? What if my food gets all over? What if this what I mean, they're lunch man. It is. It's rough out there.
Lucas (16:52):
Yeah. If you have any kids that are struggle with any sensory issues it can be a really good idea to ask the school for any alternative areas that they could go eat. The lunchroom is incredibly overstimulating. People are yelling. There's just tons of people in there and anything can happen at any time. It feels like you're in a jungle. It can feel very chaotic. Especially to somebody who maybe has some overstimulation.
Christy (17:17):
Well, and and even anxiety. I mean, anxiety is also about control and, and it's wanting to have it <laugh>. And when you go into a situation like that and there's hundreds of kids all in the same place and you have no control over what any of them are going to do. Say throw, like that is, you are just kind of putting yourself out there. Yeah.
Lucas (17:36):
So then moving a little bit older now, so going into college
Christy (17:40):
Oh yeah.
Lucas (17:41):
So for our seniors who graduated last year. And then moving into, uh, going into college, moving out of the house potentially. Um, not everybody does that, but a lot of people do Moving potentially states away. Yeah. This is a major transition. You're starting to adult for the first time.
Christy (17:59):
Yeah. Do you remember when you had to adult for the first time?
Lucas (18:02):
It was terrifying. <laugh>. Yes, I do. And I hated it.
Christy (18:07):
Yeah. It was, that's it's rough. And I think sometimes we forget that. Like you, you just get so far removed from it that you forget what it's like to be 18 years old and have to pay a bill or have to figure out your classes on a college campus by yourself. Like we're taking these kids that are worried about getting lost in a building in high school, going from class to class. And now we're putting them on giant college campuses being like, Hey, good luck out there.
Lucas (18:31):
Like, it's not like a ton of development happened between like whatever May 25th that they graduated and then now September 1st or August. Whatever. There's still just kids..
Christy (18:44):
But the expectations of those kids have now gone through the roof.
Lucas (18:47):
Through he roof. Yes. And their entire time they've, this happens too. We've, I forgot about this. Every time somebody is transitioning from elementary to middle, from middle to high school, from high school to college, the teachers are always telling the kids that the next level up, those teachers are gonna be stricter. They're gonna be meaner. They're not gonna care.
Christy (19:10):
You can't get away with this in high school.
Lucas (19:12):
Right. You can . I really wish that, um, teachers would stop saying that because it does does really scare kids. And it makes them really worried about the next year. And it's just not true. You're going even in college, like I, I feel like I got my hand held more in college actually from my professors than I did in high school.
Christy (19:33):
Probably. Yeah. So <laugh> because they want you to succeed. I mean that's the thing. That's the thing about teachers in they want you to succeed. That's like literally their job.
Lucas (19:42):
I thought they were there for the money.
Christy (19:44):
<laugh> <laugh>. You are lucky that there's not a teacher here right now.
Lucas (19:47):
I know. That was a joke. <laugh>. That was a joke.
Christy (19:50):
I mean, I think people for like, they go into teaching because they want you to succeed. That's like the whole point.
Lucas (19:58):
Whole point. Yep.
Christy (20:00):
I think it's, and it again, in college, this doesn't go away. The biggest thing that I get from kids that are going into college is like, I'm not gonna make any friends. I'm not gonna know anybody. Yeah. You and everybody else in those dorms are, you're not gonna know anybody. So you're all in the same, you're all in this together and everybody's looking to make friends and meet new people. And it is overwhelming to go from a school where you know, most of the people, you know what to expect, you know what the cliques are, you know where you fit in kind of that sort of thing. To just get like thrown into something where there isn't an established, like, not a hierarchy, but like there's not established groups that are there. It's like you're just like, you're all just out there trying to find your way.
Lucas (20:40):
Yeah. You are all in a brand new school. The social structure is completely different. And it is, it can be terrifying. But the way that you work through that is the exact same you thing that you would do for elementary, middle, and, and high school. You eliminate the uncertainties. So go walk your classes. If you're getting a new roommate, try to reach out prior to that and meet them and like alleviate that anxiety for yourself. Just trying to eliminate as many of the uncertainties as you can is gonna really help make you feel better.
Christy (21:14):
We talk, we talk a lot about like the school part of it, but like, honestly being on your own is huge. I'm talking like, how do you make an appointment? How do you go to the doctor by yourself? How do you do? Did I tell you that my first phone bill, that my first bill that I ever had to pay when I was in college? I can't believe that I'm gonna say this out loud
Lucas (21:34):
And it's gonna be recorded forever if that makes you feel better.
Christy (21:36):
It it does. But <laugh> it doesn't actually, but my first phone bill and back then I am a dinosaur. Right. We didn't have cell phones. Like if I would, if I were to call home, it was a long distance phone call that I was charged for. Like that was a thing. Okay. So it was all and the and the bill came to me, not to my mom and dad, which is like lame. But okay. And it was, it was like $61 and 73 cents or something. And I didn't know how to pay it. Yeah. So I just put $63 and then the change in an envelope and sent it off to Hawaii.
Lucas (22:14):
Of course. Because why wouldn't you?
Christy (22:16):
That just made sense to me.
Lucas (22:18):
Wait, why Hawaii?
Christy (22:20):
I don't know. That was where Concordia had their long distance something from, but that's where it went.
Lucas (22:26):
That is weird.
Christy (22:26):
I, you're telling me
Lucas (22:27):
There's a lot of weird things in that story.
Christy (22:29):
Nothing as weird as the person that opened up my $61 and 38 cents.
Lucas (22:34):
Did they just send it back to you?
Christy (22:36):
They called me. Yeah. And they were like, ma'am, you can't, you can't do that. And I was like, okay. Gotcha. Next time like <laugh>. So then I was like, ah, a check. I have to write a check. 'cause we couldn't pay anything online back then.
Lucas (22:50):
That's awesome. I love that story.
Christy (22:52):
Right. But I mean, and I have, I have several of those, honestly, because I came from, my parents were very much, took care of me. They just did my, that my mom did everything for me <laugh> for, for a very long time. So like doing the laundry, making an appointment, paying a bill, like just stupid stuff like that that I think most kids now probably know how to do. But I certainly did not. Cook a meal. I still haven't figured that out.
Lucas (23:19):
You still dunno how to do that.
Christy (23:20):
Still haven't figured that out <laugh>. Um, but I, I think I had, I maybe single-handedly kept easy Mac in business.
Lucas (23:30):
Adulting is terrifying when you've never done it before. It is, it's still a little terrifying after doing it. But <laugh> <laugh>. But a lot of it is very, uh, manageable when you just 'cause kids, A lot of kids don't wanna sound dumb or don't wanna feel dumb, and they feel like everybody except them knows how to do these things. And it's just not true. So asking the questions as a parent or as an adult in the person's life, are you having any worries about this? Opens up that conversation. And then they can share that with you and then you can be like, oh yeah, no, that's actually really easy. So let me show you how to do it. And then it alleviates all of that pressure for them. Yeah. And then opens the door for any other worries that might come up later. Or maybe you'll just open the flood gates and they'll just share all of their worries with you right there.
Christy (24:14):
Which is great.
Lucas (24:14):
Which is great because then we can just work on it. But a lot of it, the vast majority of the time is like really easy stuff That they just need to be taught how.
Christy (24:21):
Right. That also brings me to this point, which is true for all of the, all of the ages all of the time. But I think we always focus on what's gonna go wrong. Right. It's like, okay, what are you worried about? What are the things that that are, that could possibly go wrong 'cause we wanna fix it. Humans by nature are kind of fixers. We just wanna fix it. But when you, if you can shift the conversation to be like, what are you really excited about? Like what are the fun things that, that are gonna happen? Ooh, I can't, or how excited are you to do this? Like that kind of thing. It's like, that's what you're gonna focus on rather than all the stuff that's gonna go wrong or all the stuff that you're gonna worry about. It's like shift the conversation and make it, make it a more positive experience to be like, dude, you're, you're gonna be able to go out and have pizza at three o'clock in the morning if you want to because you can. 'Cause you're an adult and that sounds great. Absolutely. Not three o'clock in the morning to me anymore because I'm in bed by nine. <Laugh>. But when I was in college, that sounded relatively appealing. It was like, oh, I can go to Perkins and have a bread bowl at 12:30 AM without asking my mom. Okay.
Lucas (25:22):
Are the classes harder? Absolutely. But do you only have to go to class a few times a day? Yes. And it's great. Yep. Absolutely. Are your classes maybe like an hour and a half long? Yeah. But you only have it twice a week. Right. That sounds wonderful. Some classes you don't even have assignments. It's just tests. Which is both terrifying for some kids, <laugh> and other kids, it's like, heck yeah. This is great. So there are some really awesome things about every single transition that somebody's gonna go through. But it's really easy, like Christy said, to focus on those negatives and just worry about those things. So yeah. It is really important to talk about the exciting things as well.
Christy (25:56):
Kids, young adults in general will take on the emotions of the people around them. So if, if you are giving off this worried, oh my gosh, can you do it vibe <laugh> to people that they will absorb that. Be like, oh my gosh, can I do it? I don't know. But if you're like, no, you can do it if you, if you can, like, even if inside you're like, oh my God, I don't know if I can do it. <laugh>, if outside you are like, no, I have faith in you. I'm, I'm confident that we have raised you right and that you are gonna do great. Like, let's go that way rather than like, yeah. I don't know if they're gonna be able to do this <laugh>. Because I think there are probably, I would say most parents have a lot of those doubts in there, not doubts, but like worries. They worry of course about their children. Yes. Out there in the world.
Lucas (26:40):
Absolutely. Yes. We do. <laugh>. <laugh>. Another thing that I've noticed with especially, uh, freshmen is in that worry.
Christy (26:49):
High school freshmen or college freshmen?
Lucas (26:50):
College freshmen. Okay. Yes. Sorry. Thank you.
Christy (26:54):
Be specific.
Lucas (26:54):
So with college freshmen, they're so worried that they're not gonna meet people or not going to have friends, or they're worried. A lot of them are worried that like, they're not going to do well enough to get whatever career they're asking for. When in reality, I've never talked to anybody who has a job that their job has ever asked for their transcripts. Um, <laugh> So fun facts. True. But they will overdo it that first year join every single club, like say yes to literally everything. And then they overcommit themselves.
Christy (27:25):
And take 42 credits.
Lucas (27:26):
Right? Yeah. Trying to look as good as possible. And then they just burn out. And their anxiety's through the roof. Maybe they're depressed and they're not able to, you're not, you're just not able to do it. And so then you're really hard on yourself and then you're feeling really sad. And that's, it's really hard. And it's really important that we make sure that we're taking care of ourselves and build those boundaries up. You can always add something more. It's a lot harder to say, I can't do this anymore.
Christy (27:49):
Right. 100%. I think that is a lot of kids will go into college and be like, I'm gonna do this in three years. I'm gonna get out, I'm gonna get moving and get into my career. And it's like, let's start smaller and build bigger. It's way better to do it that way. Right. Because, and especially if you are a person who is prone to mental health issues, for sure take that into consideration. I mean, in general. That's great. We should also do that. But like, if you're a person who has any sort of underlying mental health issue, why set yourself up for failure?
Lucas (28:23):
Absolutely.
Christy (28:23):
Let's do everything we can to set you up for success.
Lucas (28:27):
And then also be aware that you don't have to know what you're gonna do with your life day one of college. No. That's the point of college is to figure out what's gonna, what you want to do. And so if you go into college as undecided or you're maybe thinking you might switch it eventually, that is okay. Let that happen.
Christy (28:47):
I think that my dorm, my freshman year, everybody I asked that first week of orientation was like, pre-med. I'm pre-med. I'm pre-Med <laugh>. Guess how many of them were no longer pre-med by semester two? Most of them. Because chemistry is hard. <laugh> <laugh>. So, and they found other areas that were actually really interesting to them. It's like, oh, I can go, I can go into psychology. That's interesting. I can go into, I'm really good at business that, that's really interesting. I wanna do communication or journalism 'cause that I'm, turns out I'm really good at it. And I think that that is the really cool part about college is that you really get to figure out where your strengths are that you didn't really get to. You don't really get to do that in high school. Ri It's like everybody's just, you just gotta meet the, meet the standard, meet the criteria. Right. And you maybe kind of have an idea of what you're better at than not. But you go to college and you really, you really get to dig into where your strengths are and what you wanna do with your life so you're not miserable.
Lucas (29:46):
Right. It's great. I loved college.
Christy (29:49):
I also loved college.
Lucas (29:50):
I switched my major three times and transferred schools once.
Christy (29:54):
What did you start as?
Lucas (29:55):
I started as a criminal justice major. Oh sure. Um, and I was, my plan was from the time I was like in high school to become a US marshal And to like be on the tactical operations team and like bust down doors.
Christy (30:11):
That is extraordinarily specific.
Lucas (30:13):
Yeah. I had this whole plan in my head. And for anybody who knows me when I tell that story, they're like, that's not you at all. And so I was taking some criminal justice classes and I think I took two semesters worth. And I was like, this is not, this is not who I am. Yeah. And then I moved into, I found out that I really liked sociology. Yeah. So I moved into sociology and it took a couple of semesters in that and really, really liked it, but it just wasn't, it wasn't right. I was doing a lot of research 'cause I wanted to help people in the, like a therapeutic, uh, style. And eventually I found my way into social work, which wasn't available at the college that I was in or wasn't as good of a program as the one I wanted to go to. And so then I transferred schools, fell in love with the subject, and here we are. I started, I was in high school and I said, I will never ever work with kids. I promised myself that. I was like, this. Now I love it. Yeah. I would never do anything else.
Christy (31:10):
That is wild.
Lucas (31:12):
So let yourself explore. Let yourself change figure out who you are. It's so awesome.
Christy (31:19):
There's so much self discovery that happens in college. And I get really excited for kids to figure out who they are when they're on their own.
Lucas (31:28):
Absolutely. Which, so when they're on their own, they're, we've talked about the parents a little bit, but especially for parents who maybe it's your last kiddo To go into college. That's hard. And there's actually a term for that. It's called empty nesting.
Christy (31:42):
And I think the biggest thing with this transition for parents is to not judge how they're feeling about it. Because there are, there are parents that are like, yes, empty nest. Woo!
Lucas (31:54):
Get out <laugh>! Let's go
Christy (31:56):
I taught you to fly. Go. And they're, they're totally stoked about it, which is awesome. Love that. And then there are other parents that, that this is a really, really difficult time. And the thing about parents of seniors is that you're together a lot. Right? Like that those parent groups are together. And when you see somebody that's like really excited and you're like, why am I not excited? Or somebody sees somebody that's sad, they're like, why am I not more sad about this? Right. And it's like, you don't have to feel any sort of, however you feel is how you feel.
Lucas (32:23):
Exactly.
Christy (32:24):
And it's valid.
Lucas (32:25):
All feelings are valid and
Christy (32:26):
It matters.
Lucas (32:29):
<laugh>. And so, 'cause there's a lot of things that, uh, that are changing when you're empty nesting, like for a lot of parents. And speaking for myself too, like my, a lot, lot of my identity is wrapped up in being a dad. and who I am as a person, what I do all day, how I plan my days. It is all around my kid. And, um, there's not a single thing that I think of that I don't consider him in those plans or what I would like to do. So when that is gone for people that can be really hard because now it's like a piece of you is no longer there. RiAnd you can have a bit of like an existential crisis or an identity crisis when that occurs.
Christy (33:07):
For sure. And I think that happens in relationships too, in marriages. 'cause for so long as a, as a couple, everything is about, everything is about your kids. And it's like all of a sudden they're not there. So it's like, how do you reconnect and how do you figure out what that, what your marriage looks like now that there are not children that you have to take care of all of the time.
Lucas (33:27):
Cause now you're just, it's just you two again. Like it used to be
Christy (33:31):
Back to basics, man. Yeah.
Lucas (33:33):
Which, like we were talking about earlier can be really exciting. Right. This can be a really awesome time for you to rediscover who you are.
Christy (33:41):
Which I, I tell parents to go and join a club. Like get on a golf team, go play pickleball. Like find something that you're interested.
Lucas (33:51):
That was very specific.
Christy (33:52):
Well, pickle, do you understand that pickleball is taking over this country?
Lucas (33:55):
I did not know that for real. I didn't. I loved it in like high school when I played it in gym class.
Christy (33:59):
If you go around to any of the tennis courts in town, they're all, they've all taped them off to be pickleball courts.
Lucas (34:05):
Interesting.
Christy (34:05):
Yeah. I cannot believe that You don't know this. I it is sweeping the nation.
Lucas (34:10):
I have been under a rock apparently.
Christy (34:11):
<laugh> you have been <laugh> you have been. Um, but find something that you're interested, a sewing, a sewing club, something that that interests you go out and do that. Connect with people. Yeah. Figure out figure out
Lucas (34:22):
Travel. Go do things that you haven't been able to do because there's kids in the picture. Right. Like, this can be a really awesome moment for you to refocus on your relationships with your partner if you have one, relationships with friends with extended family. Mm-Hmm. <affirmative> it can also be a really awesome time to focus on relationships with your children in a different way. And a lot of families feel like their relationships greatly improve after this. Because that separation helps heal a lot because you're, because when you're, when you're a kid, you just can't leave. So you're always stuck with the person that's maybe being a little bit frustrating and now you have this ability to, to have that space and it just makes everything much happier overall. Finding fulfillment or focus on accomplishment on accomplishments that are in your kids too. Like you did it right. Like this is a, this is amazing. You have raised your kid to feel confident that they can leave your home and go be an adult. Like that was, you did it. Congrats. That's amazing.
Christy (35:27):
100%. I think the other part of it that we haven't really talked about is that there also are maybe parent-child relationships that have been strained. Yeah. Where for whatever reason they maybe haven't gotten along. And then you get into this life transition and it's like now they're, now they're adults and we still haven't, we still haven't figured out our relationship yet. And that can be also really stressful. I always tell people that it's never too late to, to try to reconnect. It's never too late to try. The worst thing you can do is try and get rejected by whichever way that goes. If you're, if you're the child who needs to reconnect the parent, if the parent needs to reconnect, whatever it is, just always try. Like, just swallow some of the maybe pride or resentment and if you want to have a relationship with somebody that is strained. And sometimes that happens when you go off to college and you figure out who you are and you like come back and you maybe wanna reconnect with old relationships or figure something out. 'cause it's, it's a lot of work carrying around resentment and negative feelings towards people and whatever. But this, those times can be really, really difficult on strained relationships.
Lucas (36:34):
Yeah. And on the, on the flip side, if it is not, like, if you feel like it would be healthier for you to not pursue those relationships anymore and maybe there needs to be a very firm boundary there. That's okay too. Yeah. But there's a really healthy way to do that. And if you're not sure how to do this or if you wanna make sure that you're doing it right, that is an awesome topic for therapy. And we, we've could, we would love to help you guys.
Christy (36:58):
I can tell other people how to set boundaries really well. <laugh>
Christy (37:03):
I'm so good at that. But I, but I know what to do. Right. And I can, you know, we can help people establish boundaries in a very effective and respectful manner. And I think for a long time, a lot of people think that boundaries are mean. Right? Like, if you set boundaries that you're being mean to people, it's like no, you're setting boundaries to protect yourself and to make sure that your mental health is where it needs to be. And sometimes that means that you realize that there are some people in your life that you've maybe outgrown. And that's okay.
Lucas (37:32):
That yes, it is very okay and very healthy. One thing that can be really easy to do, because when people are empty nesting, a lot of times they might have some feelings of, of mourning or grief, is to kind of sit in that and they kind of will sit in an empty house and not do anything. And it's really important that you stay busy. So fill that time with healthy hobbies. Or maybe there's a hobby you haven't tried yet, you've always wanted to. So go try it, like pickleball, <laugh>. Everybody go try pickleball. And we just, we don't want anybody to be sitting there and just staring at a wall. Or staring at old pictures if you need to do that in order to grieve in a healthy manner. That's different. I'm not saying that. Like, that's completely off limits all of the time. But like, we just don't want that to be all of the time.
Christy (38:23):
And talk to people. Talk to people that are, that are, that know you, that are, that you know, are supportive of you. I think that there's, I say that feelings are very valid, but I think a lot of people think that they, that they're not feeling the right way or that they should feel different or they get embarrassed about how they're feeling about something. And it's like, there, there is no reason to be embarrassed about the way that you feel ever. And if, and if you, again, a great topic for therapy. It doesn't, we've talked about this before, but it does not have to be an earth shattering bad thing that happens to lead you into a therapist's office if you need help transitioning by not having your kids in your house. That is a major therapeutic topic. Because I'll tell you what, if it goes unchecked, it grows into something.
Lucas (39:09):
It can become a catastrophic mental health issue.
Christy (39:11):
Yeah. 100%. Yeah.
Lucas (39:13):
So it's a, it's a major transition. It's a major change, but changes are not necessarily endings. And so it's just things are different. It's not that everything ended. And so, but it can feel like it ended. Yeah. Like I'm no longer a parent anymore. You're always a parent. It's just that you're a different kind of parent now. You're a parent of adults. Which just looks different.
Christy (39:33):
Your kids have different needs as they grow older,
Lucas (39:35):
Which is exciting because you got them there.
Christy (39:37):
Right.
Lucas (39:38):
That's something to be celebrated.
Christy (39:40):
100%. Yee-haw,
Lucas (39:44):
I feel like a lot of parents would agree with me on this, but it takes a lot of passion to raise a child. And to do that. Especially to do it as well as you can. And it takes a lot of energy. And so when you don't have that anymore, it can feel like something is gone. That passion is still there and accessible. So let's put it towards something else. That could be maybe your a project that you wanna work on or pickleball, <laugh>
Lucas (40:15):
Joining a new community like Christy talked about earlier. Like a sewing club, right?
Christy (40:19):
Yeah. Start running. Right?
Lucas (40:20):
Oh yeah. Start running. Yeah. Just maybe you make that your new air quotes baby, and we're just really focused on that. Maybe it's traveling, maybe it's just trying something new.
Christy (40:32):
Golf.
Lucas (40:33):
Golf, whatever.
Christy (40:34):
Legos. I don't know. Anything.
Christy (40:36):
Who cares?
Lucas (40:37):
Does it make you happy? Great.
Christy (40:39):
Try it. <laugh>. Yeah. Let's do that thing.
Lucas (40:42):
So invest in yourself in this time. This is a really awesome opportunity and exciting time. Yeah. Or at least it can be.
Christy (40:50):
Well, and and you know what else is cool is like when your kids can see you thriving, that makes them feel really good too. And they can see you out doing things and having fun. And I mean, maybe they're like, uh, yo went to The Bahamas without me because that, that's also probably, that's probably also true <laugh>. But, but they like to see that, that you're out doing well and, and that you're, you're doing well without them in the house. Because granted, I'm an anxious child, but there is some guilt too that comes from like leaving your parents. That's like, oh my God, are they gonna be okay without me? <laugh> How are they ever gonna exist without me?
Lucas (41:24):
I have had so many conversations with freshmen in college that, uh, they're worried about their parents not being okay, that they're leaving because totally. Of how, of how passionate they are about being a parent. Or maybe they saw them crying a few times or they've expressed their sadness that they're gonna be alone and which is fine.
Christy (41:40):
Which is great.
Lucas (41:41):
Yes. That's okay to do.
Christy (41:42):
Express it.
Lucas (41:42):
Yeah. Yeah. That's absolutely okay. But it also makes them feel good when you're doing well.
Christy (41:47):
And it and alleviates some guilt that they have. They'll be like, oh my gosh, they're gonna be, they're they're nothing without me. Right. You know, and that's, it's so not true, but it, and it comes from a place of really caring about your parents, but yeah. It, for them to see you doing well is like so good for them too. Yeah.
Lucas (42:05):
Absolutely. So then there's everybody else who, so you're not a parent who has this, um, somebody going into college or transitioning into maybe an older school or you're not a student that's transitioning and it's just the weather is changing. Or it's just the summer is ending and that just, that just sucks.
Christy (42:23):
Plain and simple. <laugh>.
Lucas (42:25):
That can also be hard. And I don't want to, uh, diminish that or not talk about that.
Christy (42:29):
Absolutely not. I mean, how often do we say in the wintertime, because it's 97 years long. Yeah. I'm gonna do that in the summer. I'm gonna get that taken care of in the spring. I'm gonna get that taken care of during the summer. I'm gonna do that when I have more time. And then all of a sudden it's August and now we don't have time and you didn't get any of the things done that you wanted to get done.
Lucas (42:47):
I feel like you're calling me out right now, <laugh>.
Christy (42:49):
Well maybe myself too. You're right. But I think there's, there, it's really easy to get caught in. What didn't I get done this summer that I was thinking about doing all winter that I didn't end up doing? And that just causes, I mean that self-deprecation doesn't get us anywhere and it just kind of feeds the Depression beast. But I, I, I think that that's a very common thing for people to feel like I wanted to get all this stuff done in the summer and then didn't get it done. And you know what I say to that?
Lucas (43:14):
We're really good at saying there's always next year because we're Vikings fans, <laugh>.
Christy (43:18):
It's so true. Oh my gosh,
Lucas (43:21):
A really helpful thing for a lot of people that I've talked to is finding something that you enjoy about every season so that there's something to look forward to all of the time. Yeah. If, for a lot of people up here, I mean, North Dakota winters are just awful.
Christy (43:36):
They're not kind.
Lucas (43:37):
No. They're just, they, they suck and it gets really, really cold and it's to the point where it's almost dangerous to go outside at times. Or we have these crazy blizzards and so there's a lot of inside time, there's not a lot of time to go outside, but, and with that hobbies, the ability to do different hobbies kind of goes down and or to get energy out or whatever. And so trying to find different things maybe to try or to get excited about that you can maybe do inside or just differently will potentially help you feel better about those transitions. It granted, like I get excited about winter mainly because I really like playing board games and so that gives me an excuse to play more board games. Because in the summer I wanna go outside. I wanna go camping and traveling and all those things. So, um, I get really excited about that, but I like, I still don't like winter. But it's just one thing to focus on that makes it feel a little bit better.
Christy (44:34):
So I always, I get caught up on Netflix in the wintertime. Because I do not watch TV in the summer unless it's a summer Olympics. Because I love Summer Olympics, but I, I get caught up on all the shows that all my friends have watched <laugh> like all summer. And I was like, okay, I'm finally gonna catch up. Or I, reading books is also something that I'll do in the winter time. Or I mean, I have four books right now. All been recommended by friends and I haven't touched them. Do I feel a little guilt about that? I do. But I'll do it in the winter. But that's in my head, that's what I'm gonna do. I'll read 'em in the winter
Lucas (45:05):
And that makes sense.
Christy (45:06):
Because I don't have time. I don't have time. In the summer. <laugh>,
Lucas (45:09):
I know a lot of people are worried about every year the wintertime brings negative mood.. That seasonal affective disorder starts kicking in and it's, it can be really difficult and sometimes really scary for a lot of people and it's important that right now we focus on right now, I want, I would encourage everybody to be mindful and be really present in this moment so that we're not focusing on something that isn't happening yet. Let's not borrow worry. We don't know what's gonna happen. We don't know for a fact that that's going to happen this year. It might, and you know what? If it does, we survived it every other year. Right. So we're gonna do it again. But try not to get caught up on three months from now when we still do have summer left. Right. We still have some time, some time. Let's focus on today. And if that happens, not when. If that happens in the winter, we'll deal with that.
Christy (46:01):
And I think it's really important to check in with yourself. Which I, I think, I mean, journaling sounds so cliche, but it's so true. Especially if you're a person that really does go in to, if you know you have a seasonal pattern of your depression, check in with yourself every morning and say, okay, how am I feeling? How was my sleep? How are things? And and the second you feel like something is going the, the way that it, you can tell that it, that you don't want it to go, say something to somebody, say something to a coworker. Say something to a friend to be like, I don't know that this is anything, but this is happening. And I just, I just wanna keep an eye on it. I want you to keep an eye on it with me. Yeah. It's like, sweet. I'll do that.
Lucas (46:37):
Absolutely. As somebody who has a history of depression, I do that to Christy all the time. I will just, I don't know, just something feels off and I'm just like, just so you know, this happened today. I'm just letting you know so you can check on me later.
Christy (46:48):
Yours is usually sleep. You usually, because you are, you're a doer You like to get outta bed. And then when you're like, it is getting,
Lucas (46:56):
It's been a little hard to get outta bed lately. I slept in way too long today.
Christy (46:59):
Yeah. <laugh>,
Lucas (47:00):
Can you check on me in a week? Yeah. And a lot of times even just saying that and just like knowing that I have that support will lift that mood and a lot of times it's nothing. It was just an off day. Or an off week. And those are okay. They're not all red flags.
Christy (47:12):
Or your fiance left
Lucas (47:14):
Right. To go back to Canada. Gotta clarify. that. She didn't leave me. Yeah. Right.
Christy (47:19):
Sorry, <laugh>. Sorry. Yes.
Lucas (47:22):
So yeah, even just like sharing that with people can help alleviate the symptoms. Sure. And so not everything is a symptom. Not everything is, needs to be pathologized. Yeah. It could just be an off week, but just share it just in case.
Christy (47:35):
It goes back to talking man. I mean if you can talk, saying it out loud is very different than the circles that it does in your head. And it, and that's true with anything, no matter where we are, if you can say it out loud to somebody, it is amazing how it just kind of lifts off your shoulders. And a lot of times for therapy, that's what people need. They come in 'cause they just need to get it out, out of their head and out of their mouth. And then it just, it's is gonna sound really weird, but it just sounds different when you say it out loud. And you're able to look at it more objectively.
Lucas (48:05):
It does. One of the other things I tell people is, so how did we beat it last time? Because it wasn't just simply, well the sun started coming out again. Although that's a major aspect of it, but we're doing things, there's skills that you were doing to make it so that it wasn't as bad as it could have been. So start doing them. Right. In fact, never stop doing those skills by the way. But maybe start amping it up. So if it's making sure that you get exercise or that you're eating really well, let's start doing that early. And make sure that we are taking care of ourselves extra during that time so that it doesn't come back. Or if it starts coming back, we can catch it quicker and squash it.
Christy (48:42):
Morning meditations are huge. Setting an intention for the day is huge. The thing is you have to find the things that work for you. Yes. Because the things that work for other people aren't always gonna, there are a lot of people that don't get a lot of joy about, uh, waking up and working out <laugh>. Like it doesn't bring everybody joy. And meditating to me is really, really difficult. It's something that I have to work at really hard, but for some people that is, that's what they need and and that's, that's what energizes them. I, I want to be that I'm working toward it, but for some people that's what they need. For some people going out and spending time with their friends is really beneficial for other people. It's not. Find what works for you. And if you are having a hard time thinking of things to do, call a therapist. Because if there's one thing that we are well versed in, it is coping skills. <laugh>, <laugh>.
Lucas (49:31):
Annoyingly so.
Christy (49:32):
Ways to get out of a funk.
Lucas (49:34):
If we're describing you like every winter right now, like, please come in and come in earlier than when it starts hitting you again. Like, 'cause we can help you prevent it from even occurring. And there's also an aspect too of like check with your, uh, doctors and maybe they could run some blood tests to see if you are low on vitamin D. Yeah. A lot of us just naturally run low up here because of the lack of sunlight that we get and getting on some vitamin D supplements can be really helpful for a lot of people. So, or there's things called like SAD lights too. Make sure that you're doing that under the instruction of a doctor, however, don't just buy one off Amazon and use it <laugh> please. There's just a lot of things that we can do.
Christy (50:16):
Open up your windows, not the windows 'cause it's cold. But like the shades. Yes. You know. Let, let in some natural sunlight. The more natural sunlight. I mean we get v very small daytime hours in the winter. And so like you have to monopolize on the stuff that you got.
Lucas (50:32):
Absolutely.
Christy (50:33):
If the sun is out, open up your shades.
Lucas (50:35):
Go to work when it's dark, I come home when it's dark. We always want to encourage you to ask the question, is it just me? You're likely not alone and there is always a way to help. If anything we have talked about today resonates with you, please reach out.
Christy (50:46):
Do you have a topic you'd like us to talk about? Message us. We'd love to hear from you. Our email address is, isit justme@dakotaranch.org? Or you can just drop us a text message. Facebook message dm, carrier pigeon <laugh>.
Lucas (51:02):
Anything else?
Christy (51:03):
I think that's it.
Lucas (51:04):
Okay. And don't forget to share us with your friends and family.
Announcer (51:07):
Thanks for listening to today's episode of Is It Just Me? To learn more or make an appointment for psychiatric or mental health services at Dakota Family Services, go to dakotafamilyservices.org or call 1-800-201-6495.
People tend to perceive risk as being inherently negative. But for teenagers, risk-taking is a healthy, normal, and important part of growing up. In this episode of Mind Your Mind, Host Tim Unsinn talks to Vanessa Lien, Nurse Practitioner, about creating a safe environment for your teenager to take risks—and knowing when to step in when they start taking risks that could result in serious and long-term negative consequences.;
15-25% of American students have experienced bullying. And cyberbullying is on the rise. Children who experience bullying suffer from long-lasting effects including depression, anxiety, loneliness, low self-esteem, low academic achievement, and more. Children engaging in bullying behavior are impacted as well. In this episode of "Mind Your Mind," Dakota Family Services therapist, April Morris, LCSW, talks about the impact of bullying and what parents can do to help.;
2020 was the year for living with chaos. Everything—at home, at work, and at school—is out of sync and changing from day to day. In this episode of "Mind Your Mind," Dakota Family Services psychologist, Dr. Megan Spencer, shares simple tips for building routine and structure into your life. She also provides an excellent, yet simple, way to ground yourself when you start to feel overwhelmed or anxious.;
Children experience grief over many things—the loss of a loved one, moving away from their friends, the death of a pet. In this episode of "Mind Your Mind," Lucas Mitzel, a therapist at Dakota Family Services, talks about the stages of grief, and how to walk your child through the grieving process. He will also talk about ways to determine if your child needs to see a professional who can help them untangle the many emotions of grief.;
In today's episode of Mind Your Mind, your host Tim Unsinn talks with Christy Wilkie about suicide warning signs and things you can do to make a difference. Christy, a therapist at Dakota Family Services, wants to normalize conversations about suicide so people don't feel like they are suffering alone. She says, "There is never a reason to not ask the question, 'Hey, are you OK?' Asking the question can save a life.";
In today's episode of Mind Your Mind, your host Tim Unsinn talks with Dr. Wayne Martinsen. Dr. Martinsen, Medical Director and Psychiatrist at Dakota Family Services, defines wellness as more than just the absence of disease, but as a state of well-being. In this episode he will share current wellness research, questions to ask to determine your own well-being, and steps you can take to achieve and maintain wellness.;
When someone in our life has cancer, it's difficult to know what to say or how to help. In this episode of Mind Your Mind, Host Tim Unsinn talks to April Morris about how you can best support a friend or loved one who has cancer. Morris, an outpatient therapist at Dakota Family Services, shares tips for knowing what/what not to say, and actions that speak louder than words.;
Sleep is just as important for mental health as it is physical health. During sleep, our brains process our memories, emotions, and other information. In this episode of "Mind Your Mind," April Morris tells us why sleep is so important for overall well-being and encourages us to prioritize sleep. April, a therapist at Dakota Family Services, provides practical tips for improving sleep hygiene so you can live your best life.;
Stress does not discriminate, and it comes in many shapes and forms. In this episode of "Mind Your Mind," Dr. Megan Spencer talks about ways to identify and listen to the stress in our bodies. Learn relaxation techniques for managing stress over time, self-care routines that decrease negative stress, and things you can do to bring calm into your life.;
Physical activity has a huge potential to enhance our well-being. Exercise increases our mental alertness, energy, and positive mood. In this episode of "Mind Your Mind," Christy Wilkie, therapist at Dakota Family Services, talks about how movement, even for five minutes, can promote changes in the brain that lead to neural growth, reduced inflammation, and feelings of calm and well-being. Listen now to learn more about how moving your body can improve your mental health.;
Diagnosing children with a mental health-related condition can be controversial. Many worry this gives children a label that is set in stone and will follow them around their entire lives. In this episode of Mind Your Mind, Dr. Wayne Martinsen talks about the role of diagnosis in getting children the help they need. Martinsen encourages us to think about mental health diagnoses the same as we do any health diagnosis. If you go the doctor and they diagnose you with strep throat, that doesn’t mean you’ll have strep throat forever, or that you are a strep throat victim. It just means that you have a collection of symptoms that point to strep throat, and the doctor will use that diagnose to provide the appropriate treatment.;
ADHD is diagnosed and treated at a much higher rate than in the past, especially in the United States. Why? In this episode of Mind Your Mind, Dr. Wayne Martinsen, Psychiatrist/Medical Director at Dakota Family Services, explains how the changing world has made it harder for people with shorter attention spans to be successful. In the past, if school was hard for you, you could get a job, work your way up, and live a middle-class lifestyle. Not so in today’s world. Learn more about this fascinating take on ADHD.;
In today's episode of Mind Your Mind, your host Tim Unsinn talks with Christy Wilkie about the Feelings Wheel*. Christy, a therapist at Dakota Family Services, says humans experience 34,000 different feelings! She demonstrates how to use the Feelings Wheel to help you identify your emotions so you can control the behaviors associated with them. *Adapted by classtools.net from the Emotional Wheel. The Emotional Wheel was developed by American psychologist, Dr. Robert Plutchik.;
In today's episode of "Mind Your Mind," Vanessa Lien, Nurse Practitioner, talks about the many changes occurring in the teen brain. The teenage brain is highly susceptible to stress, but it is also very resilient. Learn coping strategies you can teach your teen to protect their brains and help them cope with stress and emotional struggles.;
Going back to school after summer vacation can be a stressful time for both kids and parents. The transition from the unstructured summer to a more regimented routine can lead to stress and anxiety. Worries about fitting in, bullying, homework, getting to school on time, and dealing with peer pressure are all additional stressors that may weigh on children when it's time to go back to school. In this episode of “Mind Your Mind,” Tim Unsinn speaks with Therapist Falan Johnson. Falan helps us understand why back to school anxiety is common, provides strategies for managing the added stress, and shares resources parents can use to prepare their children for the new school year.;
The grief of losing a friend or loved one to suicide is complicated and can be especially difficult. In addition to the grief, sadness, and loneliness of any loss, people might experience guilt, confusion, rejection, anger, and shame. The stigma of suicide complicates it even more, often preventing survivors talking about their loss or getting the help they need. In this episode of Mind Your Mind, Tim Unsinn visits with Dakota Family Services' therapist, Christy Wilkie. Christy helps listeners understand the complicated nature of suicide grief and how to move through it with compassion and self-acceptance.;
You will be shocked at the seemingly safe places predators can connect with your children online. In this episode of Mind Your Mind, Lucas Mitzel, a therapist at Dakota Family Services, talks about the things you need to know to keep your children safe. Learn the many websites and platforms used to target children, how to monitor their internet usage, and how to talk to your children about the dangers.;
Pregnancy and the birth of a child can be a joyous and exciting time, but some women struggle with their mental health as they transition to motherhood. Depression, anxiety, and other pregnancy-related mental health conditions may surface during or after pregnancy. In this episode of "Mind Your Mind," Tim Unsinn speaks with Clinical Psychologist Dr. Megan Spencer. Dr. Spencer helps us understand the common symptoms and causes of postpartum depression, as well as what to do if you think you may be experiencing it.;
Did you know that in addition to calming and focusing our minds, meditation can improve our physical health? In this episode of Mind Your Mind, Host Tim Unsinn visits with Dr. Wayne Martinsen, Psychiatrist, Dakota Family Services, about the surprising health benefits of meditation. A regular meditation practice can increase longevity, reduce the risk of dementia, reduce inflammation, and play a significant role in the treatment of high blood pressure and immune disorders. Learn about the many forms of meditation and how you can start your own meditation practice today.;
Anxiety and depression are invisible illnesses—meaning they don't have outward symptoms visible to others. Because they are invisible, they are often hard for people to explain. In this episode of "Mind Your Mind," Host Tim Unsinn visits with April Morris, LCSW, Therapist, Dakota Family Services. April references the spoon theory of chronic illness created by Christine Miserandino, an award-winning writer, blogger, speaker, and lupus patient advocate. Listen now to learn more about spoons as a metaphor for energy and how you can use them to understand and explain anxiety and depression.;
While we hear a lot about autism in the news, many of us still have misconceptions about its causes and symptoms. In this episode of Mind Your Mind, therapist Falan Johnson dispels some of these misconceptions and explains the three levels of autism. Johnson then focuses on the least understood level—high functioning autism. Learn how to identify symptoms of high functioning autism in your child, the importance of early intervention, and ways you can support them.;
In this episode of Mind Your Mind, therapist April Morris talks about boundaries. April will define boundaries, explain their importance, and help you set boundaries that match your values and strengthen your relationships. Learn how healthy boundaries can improve your mental and physical health, and how you can say “no” respectfully.;
Going through infertility tests and treatments can be an extremely difficult and lonely time for couples. In this episode of Mind Your Mind, Lucas Mitzel talks about his own experience. He also shares tips for couples struggling with infertility, and for friends and family members who want to be supportive but don’t know what to say or do.;
In this episode of Mind Your Mind, Host Tim Unsinn talks to Therapist Falan Johnson about panic attacks. What do they feel like? What causes them? How can you prevent or manage them? Listen now to learn more and discover techniques that might work for you or your loved one.;
Are you concerned about your child's mental health but aren't sure what to do? Join Host Tim Unsinn and his guest, Therapist Jesse Lamm, as they discuss ways you can support your child through a difficult time.;
Are the stresses of college (constant worry, fitting in, lack of sleep, etc.) affecting your ability to function? Join Host Tim Unsinn and his guest, April Morris, LCSW, as they discuss ways to manage or eliminate the stressors that are impacting your well-being.;
Are you struggling to get enough sleep each night? Maybe you have difficulty falling and staying asleep. You can't get comfortable. You feel anxious and your brain just won't shut off. According to the Sleep Foundation, over one-third of adults in the U.S. sleep for less than seven hours a night. Join Host Tim Unsinn and his guest, April Morris, LCSW, in this episode of "Mind Your Mind," as they discuss how insomnia can affect many other areas of your life, as well as practical tips to improve your sleep hygiene.;
It's not unusual for children to have temper tantrums or for adolescents to be angry. But when they become out of proportion to the situation in intensity and duration, your child might be suffering from a mood disorder. In this episode of Mind Your Mind, Host Tim Unsinn visits with Dr. Megan Spencer, a psychologist at Dakota Family Services. Listen now to learn how to distinguish between normal mood changes and mood disorders, and some steps you can take to help your child.;
Resilience is not a personality trait or characteristic. Resilience isn't ignoring or emotional numbing or pretending that a problem doesn't exist. And being resilient doesn’t mean we won’t face adversity. Rather, resilience is our ability to bounce back from adversity. In this episode of Mind Your Mind, Dr. Megan Spencer, psychologist at Dakota Family Services, shares ten ways to build resilience so you are ready when adversity strikes.;
You can probably think of a dozen things that make you feel sad. Sadness is a normal human emotion that helps us process the events in our lives. But what is "normal" sadness? When does sadness move from "normal" to something you may need help processing? In this episode of "Mind Your Mind," Falan Johnson, a therapist at Dakota Family Services, will answer these questions and more. Learn the importance of allowing yourself to feel sad so you can move past it, and, when it might be time to seek professional help.;
In today's world, we are constantly bombarded by messages about who we should be, how we should look, what we should do or wear, and more. With the increased accessibility and prevalence of social media, kids and adolescents are hearing and seeing these messages at younger and younger ages. How do we help ourselves and our teens combat these messages and find our true selves? In this episode of "Mind Your Mind," Therapist Jenika Rufer helps us wade through the unimportant things to find what we truly value so we can become our best selves.;
Unsure of whether your therapy is working for you? In this episode of “Mind Your Mind,” our host Tim Unsinn talks with Dakota Family Services therapist Lucas Mitzel about how to make your therapy sessions more productive. Making progress in therapy can often come down to simply having an open mind and a plan for discussion. Although each session can evoke a wide range of emotions, you should always leave feeling that some sort of movement has happened.;
In this episode of Mind Your Mind, host Tim Unsinn and Dakota Family Services therapist Christy Wilkie talk about Cognitive Behavioral Therapy and its effectiveness in battling unhelpful thoughts and beliefs. Utilizing cognitive restructuring, CBT helps change inaccurate and damaging self-perceptions and perceptions of others, leading to healthier day-to-day thought patterns. Christy also touches on multiple CBT exercises to try at home, as well as some of her own tactics for promoting helpful thoughts.;
Are your worries and fears about the future getting in the way of daily life? If so, you may be one of the many people who suffer from anxiety. In this special Community Chat episode of Mind Your Mind, Christy Wilkie and Lucas Mitzel talk about the many types of anxiety and what they can look like in both children and adults. They also touch on ways to combat anxiety attacks, including using grounding techniques, mindfulness, muscle relaxation, and more.;
In this episode of Mind Your Mind, host Tim Unsinn and psychiatrist Dr. Wayne Martinson discuss autism and signs of it in children, touching on the different levels of the autism spectrum and where people fall. Learn about how autism often affects children's social skills, communication, and behavior, as well as its connections to other disorders and how to handle it.;
Many people find themselves dealing with high levels of stress and anxiety in their daily lives. However, there are plenty of simple strategies to help regulate these emotions. In this episode of Mind Your Mind, host Tim Unsinn talks with therapist Sandy Richter about various coping exercises to help you regulate and calm yourself, including breathing and movement exercises for both children and adults.;
Medication can affect people in many different ways. In this episode of Mind Your Mind, host Tim Unsinn and psychiatric nurse practitioner Amanda Daggett talk about genetic testing and its use in discerning how different individuals might react to various medications. Tim and Amanda also touch on some of the facts and myths surrounding genetic testing, including what testing can and can’t indicate and where the science is currently at.;
Anxiety is one of the most common mental health problems people face. However, there are many ways to manage and understand it. On this episode of Mind Your Mind, host Tim Unsinn and therapist Lucas Mitzel discuss what causes anxiety and how it can affect people’s day-to-day lives, as well as the difference between anxiety and fear and how to combat chronic anxiety with grounding techniques.;
In this special Community Chat episode of Mind Your Mind, Psychologist Megan Spencer and Psychiatrist Wayne Martinsen discuss how loneliness and social isolation are increasing in our country, as well as what that means for individuals’ health in the long term. They also give advice on how to get yourself or your loved ones more connected with others, including how to connect both in-person and online.;
Does it seem like your child is “stuck” in therapy, or engaging in dangerous behaviors like self-harm and suicidality? In this special Community Chat episode of Mind Your Mind, Psychologist Hannah Baczynski and therapist April Morris discuss Dialectical Behavior Therapy and its effectiveness in treating patients who have found traditional therapy unsuccessful. Learn about the 4 core skills of DBT and what makes DBT unique from other forms of therapeutic treatment.;
When our children are struggling with their mental health, it can be hard knowing how to help them. However, in addition to therapy, medication can be a viable and effective option for improving your child’s mental health. In this episode of Mind Your Mind, our host Tim Unsinn talks with psychiatric mental health nurse Amanda Daggett about how to know if your child needs medication, what the process is for a prescription, and how to tell if their medication is right for them.;
Did you know that depression occurs in about 15% of children? In this episode of Mind Your Mind, our host Tim Unsinn talks with Psychiatrist Dr. Wayne Martinsen about depression in kids and adolescents, including signs of depression to look out for and how to know when to reach out to a care provider. They also touch on how to know whether your child’s sadness is caused by depression or other external factors and what you can do to try and prevent depression in your child.;
It can be difficult knowing how to recognize and treat depression in children and adolescents. In this special community chat episode of Mind Your Mind, Psychologist Megan Spencer and Therapist April Morris discuss signs of depression to look out for, including both behavioral and physical signs that your child may be depressed. They also touch on the influence of environment, physical illnesses or diagnoses, and genetics on children’s mental health.;
Humans are hardwired for social connection, but it can be difficult knowing where to fit in as unique individuals. In this episode of Mind Your Mind, host Tim Unsinn and therapist Christy Wilkie talk about the importance of using your strengths, interests, and relationships to figure out where you belong. They also touch on signs that you might not be staying true to yourself, as well as how to handle feelings of being left out.;
While often perceived as only relating to those who’ve experienced warfare, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) can affect anyone. In this special Community Chat episode of Mind Your Mind, Psychologist Dr. Hannah Baczynski and therapist Lucas Mitzel explain what trauma is, how it affects each person differently, and when to seek treatment for trauma-related symptoms. They also discuss different treatment options for PTSD, touching on the pros and cons of each.;
Though autism is one of the most commonly discussed mental health diagnoses in the community, it is often one of the most misunderstood. In this special Community Chat episode of Mind Your Mind, therapists Lucas Mitzel and Falan Johnson discuss what autism is, how it appears in children and adolescents, and how it may look different between individuals. They also touch on how autism can show up differently in boys than in girls and offer intervention tips for parents and caregivers.;
Autism is sometimes perceived as a disorder that only affects children and adolescents, but it is actually a lifelong diagnosis. In this special Community Chat episode of Mind Your Mind, psychologists Dr. Hannah Baczynski and Dr. Megan Spencer explore the symptoms and nuances of autism in adults, touching on the history of autism spectrum disorder, the research surrounding it, how autism commonly presents in adults, and more.;
Though spirituality is often associated with religion, it can mean much more than simply attending religious services or praying. In this episode of Mind Your Mind, host Tim Unsinn and psychiatrist Dr. Wayne Martinsen define spirituality and discuss its relevance in daily life, touching on ways people experience, express, and cultivate spirituality. They also talk about the link between spirituality, religion and meaning in life.;
Setting goals is easy. Working towards them is hard. In this episode of Mind Your Mind, host Tim Unsinn talks with Dakota Family Services therapist Christy Wilkie about how to set healthy, realistic goals, as well as the importance of managing your expectations and staying persistent. Whether you’re starting an exercise routine, writing a book, trying a new diet, or building your career, keep these tips in mind when setting your next big goal.;
Fear is powerful. It can cause us to avoid problems, people, and even opportunities in our life. But it can also be overcome. In this episode of Mind Your Mind, host Tim Unsinn speaks with Falan Johnson, a therapist at Dakota Family Services, about the function of fear and how to face it. Learn where fear comes from, how to identify it, and how to calm down and build confidence when you’re feeling afraid.;
In this episode of Mind Your Mind, our host Tim Unsinn talks with Dakota Family Services therapist Jessie Mertz about the “3 R’s”—Regulate, Relate, and Reason. They discuss what each term means, how they build upon each other, and how this approach can help you calm others who are experiencing distress.;
Schizophrenia is a chronic, complex mental health disorder that affects around 1% of people in the United States. In this episode of Mind Your Mind, host Tim Unsinn and psychiatrist Dr. Wayne Martinsen discuss the symptoms and implications of schizophrenia, touching on its many effects on individual and family life. Learn about how schizophrenia is treated, how it affects physical health, when it tends to develop, and how it is perceived between cultures.;
Although the stigma surrounding mental health is gradually disappearing, it can still be tricky knowing how to talk about it. In this episode of Mind Your Mind, host Tim Unsinn and psychologist Megan Spencer explore how to have a conversation with someone about their mental health, including signs that you should talk to them, how to start the conversation, and some possible reactions to expect from the other person.;
Are you feeling cooped up indoors? Join host Tim Unsinn and therapist Lucas Mitzel in this episode of Mind Your Mind as they discuss the importance of getting outside on your mental health. Learn about the benefits of green and blue spaces, activities you can do while outside, and how being outside can help improve symptoms of different mental health diagnoses.;
In this episode of Mind Your Mind, Tim Unsinn talks with psychologist Dr. Hannah Baczynski about the signs of burnout, how to prevent it, and how to know if your burnout is related to general life stressors or a mental health disorder. They also talk about the difference between fatigue and burnout, as well as how to support yourself and alleviate burnout when you’re experiencing it.;
Many of us know someone who has been diagnosed with a chronic illness, or have been diagnosed with one ourselves. In this episode of Mind Your Mind, host Tim Unsinn talks with therapist April Morris about how chronic illness can impact daily living and mental health, as well as how to seek support if you have been diagnosed with a chronic illness.;
Although the term ‘bipolar’ is sometimes used as slang to describe someone who is moody or indecisive, true bipolar disorder is a complex and sometimes severe mental health disorder that affects the way a person thinks, feels, and behaves. In this episode of Mind Your Mind, host Tim Unsinn discusses bipolar disorder with nurse practitioner Amanda Daggett, touching on what the disorder is, what its symptoms look like, and how it can be treated.;
How much time do you spend each day looking at your phone? An hour or two? Multiple hours? In this episode of Mind Your Mind, host Tim Unsinn meets with therapist Christy Wilkie to discuss how social media use can impact our mental health, relationships, and behavior. Learn tips for monitoring your child’s internet use, as well as how to manage your own time spent on social media.;
While OCD is sometimes perceived as simply a desire to keep things neat and organized, it can actually have much more severe symptoms for those who experience it. In this episode of Mind Your Mind, host Tim Unsinn meets with psychologist Dr. Megan Spencer to talk about who Obsessive Compulsive Disorder affects, what its signs and symptoms are, and how to seek help if you or a loved one has been diagnosed with OCD.;
Bad habits can be easy to start but sometimes very difficult to stop. In this episode of Mind Your Mind, host Tim Unsinn and therapist Falan Johnson talk about breaking bad habits, including where habits come from, how to know if a habit is bad, and steps you can take to stop it.;
Are you looking for some help on your mental health journey? In this episode of Mind Your Mind, host Tim Unsinn and therapist Jessie Mertz talk about how to find a therapist, including what you should know when searching and what questions to ask when you meet a therapist for the first time. They also touch on what the letters after a therapist’s name mean, and how they apply to the type of services or treatment you might be looking for.;
Whether it’s from asking someone on a date or applying for a job, we all experience rejection at some point in our lives. In this episode of Mind Your Mind, host Tim Unsinn talks with therapist April Morris about how to cope with rejection, including the common coping stages, the importance of acceptance, and how rejection can impact people differently.;
Like other personality disorders, borderline personality disorder is a commonly misunderstood and stigmatized mental illness. In this episode of Mind Your Mind, host Tim Unsinn talks with Lucas Mitzel, a therapist at Dakota Family Services, about what BPD is, how it affects someone’s behavior, and where to seek treatment if your child has been diagnosed with BPD.;
Do you think you might be suffering from an undiagnosed mental disorder? If so, a psychological assessment might be able to help. In this episode of Mind Your Mind, psychologist Dr. Hannah Baczynski and host Tim Unsinn talk about what to expect from a psychological assessment, including what an assessment might include, what information you might receive from the psychologist, and what you should communicate with your psychologist before and after receiving an assessment.;
In this episode of Mind Your Mind, host Tim Unsinn and Amanda Daggett explore the topic of using supplements for mental health. In addition to talking about some of the most commonly used supplements like melatonin and St. John’s Wort, they also discuss the benefits, the risks, and the research surrounding various supplements.;
Feeling like you’ve got the winter blues? If you’re noticing symptoms of depression with the change of seasons, it may be a sign that you’re suffering from Seasonal Affective Disorder, or SAD. In this special Community Chat episode of Mind Your Mind, therapists Christy Wilkie and Lucas Mitzel discuss the common symptoms of Seasonal Affective Disorder, how it can affect other mental health disorders, and some useful tips, tricks, and resources for managing symptoms of SAD.;
Join Christy and Lucas, therapists at Dakota Family Services, as they share practical tips for building confidence when trying new things. From managing self-doubt to building resilience, this episode will empower you to approach new experiences with a positive mindset.;
In this episode, Christy and Lucas explore why relationships can be so hard. Join them as they discuss the characteristics of both healthy and toxic relationships, talk about the difference between normal conflict and abuse, and help you discover your love languages so you and your partner can best express your love to each other.;
In this episode, Christy and Lucas explore anxiety. Join them as they discuss the signs and symptoms of an anxiety disorder, what you can do to decrease your anxiety, and how to best help loved ones struggling with anxiety.;
In this episode, Christy and Lucas explore depression. Join them as they discuss the signs and symptoms of Major Depressive Disorder, what you can do to help yourself feel better, and what you can do to help your loved ones. They will talk about coping strategies, therapy interventions, and ways to help you identify when your child might need extra help.;
Change is inevitable. Join Christy and Lucas as they explore big and small changes and how they impact you. Learn why change can be so hard, even good change, and discover ways to manage it effectively.;
In this episode of "Is It Just Me," Christy and Lucas discuss the very important topic of suicide. Listen to learn about risk factors, warning signs, and what you can do to help a loved one who is struggling. Remember, you are not alone. If you need immediate assistance, call 911. If you need to talk to someone, call the Suicide and Crisis Lifeline at 988.;
Join Lucas and Christy as they explore the power of spending time outdoors on mental and emotional well-being. Discover practical tips, personal anecdotes, and expert insights on the benefits of getting outside and reconnecting with nature.;
In this episode of "Is It Just Me?" Lucas and Christy discuss ADHD, shedding light on its prevalence and impact on daily life. Learn practical strategies for managing symptoms and understand why your friend or loved one with ADHD does the things they do.;
In this episode of "Is It Just Me?", join our hosts Christy and Lucas as they delve into the complex relationship between the internet and mental health. With the digital age bringing information and social connections to our fingertips, it also presents unique challenges and opportunities for our safety and psychological well-being.;
In this episode of "Is It Just Me?", Christy and Lucas discuss how common it is for people to see themselves differently from others. Using their own personal triumphs and challenges as examples, they outline the things that shape our self-esteem. Additionally, they share simple daily practices to help listeners recognize and celebrate their own personal victories. This episode is filled with tips and engaging stories aimed at encouraging listeners to undertake challenges that foster self-growth and personal confidence.;
In this episode of "Is It Just Me," Lucas and Christy talk about what it's like to begin therapy. Feeling apprehensive about starting therapy is normal, but surmountable. Together, Lucas and Christy unravel common myths about therapy and emphasize the role of therapy in disrupting negative life patterns and routines that are no longer serving you.;
In this month’s episode of the "Is It Just Me?" podcast, Lucas Mitzel and Christy Wilkie, Dakota Family Services, dive into the complexities of trauma and its therapy. The episode sheds light on Trauma-Focused Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (TF-CBT) and the importance of creating a trauma narrative as a cornerstone of healing. The thoughtful discussions aim to educate listeners on the intricacies of trauma, the innovative methods used in therapy, and the role of caregivers in the recovery process. Through expert insights and compassionate storytelling, Lucas and Christy provide practical advice and real-world examples for individuals who have experienced trauma.;
In this episode of “Is It Just Me?”, Lucas and Christy delve into the world of mindfulness and relaxation techniques. From body scans to mindfulness exercises, they provide a soothing experience to help you unwind and distress. Discover practical tips and advice on incorporating mindfulness into your daily routine and learn how to prioritize mental well-being in today's fast-paced world.;
In this special additional episode of “Is It Just Me” join therapist Lucas Mitzel as he gives listeners a transformative journey within their own body and mind. In this episode, Lucas guides listeners through a soothing body scan to promote calm, mindfulness, and inner peace. This episode offers a unique mixdown of gentle narration, and relaxation techniques, leaving you feeling refreshed, rejuvenated, and more connected to yourself.;