Christy Wilkie provides outpatient therapy for children and adolescents, ages 5-25. Christy typically uses a CBT approach, but also provides collaborative problem solving and several other types of therapy. She earned her master’s degree in Social Work from Indiana University-Purdue University.
Christy provides telehealth and in-person services in our Fargo location. Call 1-701-419-8779 to make an appointment.
Featuring Christy Wilkie, LCSW, Dakota Family Services
Tim Unsinn:
Welcome to Mind Your Mind, a podcast presented by Dakota Family Services, an outpatient behavioral health clinic located in Minot, Bismarck, and Fargo, North Dakota. In this podcast, I will talk with our experts about understanding and nurturing our mental health and wellness. I'm your host, Tim Unsinn. Join me each episode as we explore the intricacies of our minds, decrease the stigma of mental illness, learn practical tips for managing our mental health and wellbeing, and recognize when it's time to ask for help. Join me now to mind your mind.
TU:
Welcome to this episode of Mind Your Mind. Our guest is Christie Wilkie. Christy is a therapist in Fargo and provides outpatient therapy for children and adolescents ages five to 25. She is a frequent half-marathoner as well. Christy, it's great to have you on Mind Your Mind. Our topic is exercise and movement and their impact on mental health. However, before we get to the topic, let's talk about why you do what you do.
Christy Wilkie:
I am so glad to be here. Thank you for having me. Why I do what I do. Specifically, we're talking about exercise and I think this has become a topic that's been, I've become passionate about in the last couple of years, because I know that I've seen firsthand the changes that having regular exercise can have on somebody. And then when you, when you see those changes and you understand the power that even a little bit of exercise or movement in your day can have, I just want everybody to kind of feel that. So I'm talking today about exercise because I'm hoping that just hearing some of the positive things that can come from having an active lifestyle will get people moving in the right direction.
TU:
Exercise helps you feel good and you don't have to run a half marathon to feel good and exercise because I can drive a half marathon. I don't think I can run it. I may be able to walk it over a couple of days, but that's about it. So let's talk about exercise and movement and their impact on mental health. Everyone has been told that exercise improves mental health, but what's really happening.
CW:
I think that's an important thing to talk about because when people talk about mental health, it's kinda like, yeah, yeah, yeah, exercise, diet, and sleep. We all know, blah, blah, blah. And I would encourage you to listen to April Morris's podcast on sleep, because there is way more to sleep than just closing your eyes. The things that happened during the sleep cycle are huge. And so today I kind of want to tackle exercise because everybody knows exercise is good for you, but what's happening? Exercise for depression, for example, I'll talk about depression, anxiety, PTSD, and chronic stress, and the impact that it can have on those things specifically. But exercise can actually treat mild or moderate depression as effectively as an antidepressant medication by running for 15 minutes a day, or walking for one hour. Then that can reduce major depression by 26%, which is huge.
TU:
Well, I was going to say too, you know, when we first talk about exercise, the word exercise often will turn people off, but exercise doesn't have to be excruciating. You just said walking for one hour. I think we can all do that. Whatever pace is, but you can walk for an hour. It's going to help you.
CW:
Yeah. And in fact, I was talking to my husband because he's trying to get walking too. And it's, most of the research says that five minutes. If you can commit five minutes, that'll kick some of those endorphins in and improve your mood with just five minutes of walking. And that's kind of why I said 'exercise and movement.' So I feel like people think of exercise and they think, nobody wants to exercise. I have to go to the gym. I have to sweat buckets to have any positive impact in my life. And that's just not true. It's just, it's just moving. And that can be done in so many different ways. And what it does, it promotes changes in the brain and it includes neural growth, reduced inflammation, and new activity patterns that promote feelings of calm and well-being.
CW:
And the kicker is endorphins. Man, you get those endorphins moving through your brain and that really impacts your mood and how you feel. And it serves as a distraction to break out of negative thinking cycles. That feed depression, when you're doing something like that, you're focusing on the activity that you're doing. It's hard not to because sometimes it's intense or it's like, I don't want to do it. But when you're walking, when you're running, when you're doing yoga, you're very focused, and it's a very mindful sort of activity. And if it's not, you should practice it to be a mindful sort of activity because it will take you out of the negative spiral of thoughts that are going in your head. And that's for depression and anxiety, both. So when they talk about running or they talk about walking or they talk, anything that you're doing outside, inside is to think about all five senses. What do you hear? What do you see? What do you smell? What do you feel? What do your feet feel like on the road? What does the sun feel like on your face? Those are all things to take in too that will help promote mindful exercising to stop that reel of negative comments that people have going in their head most of the time.
TU:
Yeah. I think when we talk about exercise, in your a great point, think about the high you get from doing it before you do it, to get you to do it. Because if you're thinking about, Oh, the sweat and the, the, you know, the pain and all that stuff going into, it's not going to be as enjoyable. Think about when you accomplished it the last time and how great you felt. And you're just like, wow, I'm on top of the mountain. That's what you should feel like when you start your workout.
CW:
Absolutely. And it's so hard to do that. And especially when we're talking about people who are anxious or depressed, the thought of getting out of bed and doing something, it just feels like one more thing. It's just like the thought is very daunting. Or if you're anxious and you don't want to go to a gym because gyms are scary and you don't really know what people are gonna think about you, or you think people are gonna judge you, which is the one thing that COVID has done for us, is that it's given us a lot of at-home options for working out. So you don't have to get out and do something. You can do it in your own home. There's YouTube videos. There's Peloton still has their free 90 day trial. There's things to do outside, simple as playing with your dog. All of those things will increase your mental health.
CW:
And there's something to be. I know that people are anxious to go to gyms, which I totally understand. But there is a lot of positive camaraderie that comes from going to gyms. But a lot of times that social anxiety will get in the way of people, but you don't have to go to a gym in order to exercise. I think there's that, that belief too. It's like you could go and walk downtown Fargo and do some, do some window shopping and that's activity. That's exercise, that's movement. That's what we're talking about here. We're not talking about running marathons. That's not what it is. It might turn into that eventually, but that's not what we're focusing on.
TU:
Yeah. Tap into your love of the outdoors because with the weather changing, and I dare say, we, if you are familiar with Fargo and what typical winters are like, we didn't have a winter this year. There were maybe half a dozen days where it wasn't short weather. So get outdoors and just take that walk and enjoy. And don't be under the anxiety of, I've got to go to a gym. So some, some great points. Now we talked a little bit about exercise and movement and how we feel those effects. Any other thoughts on that? Yeah,
CW:
Stress, I think, especially in the pandemic, there's been a whole different level of stress that we've experienced this year that I don't think any of us have really lived through before. But when you're stressed, your muscles might be tense and you might not even realize it. The common problem areas are your face, your neck, and shoulders causing pain or headaches. And stress can also lead to insomnia, heartburn, stomach issues, which lead to worry and discomfort about those issues. And so then you start into this, you start worrying about what you're worrying about, and that's just a terrible cycle to be in. So exercise will help break that cycle. It releases endorphins and helps relax the muscles and relieve tension that stored up in the body. Mind and body are very closely related. How you think and how you feel, how you feel and how you think; they're very closely related. I don't know if you'd ever do yoga, but if you do yoga, they'll kind of tell you, you know, the ways that your body is connected to how it's feeling and where we store some of that stress. And to find ways to just get some of that out and realize that you're stressed, is huge. Because a lot of times we walk around really, really, really, really tense. And we have no real recollection of it.
TU:
We're talking about stress. It's like, are you stressed? No I'm fine; everything's great, but inside we're just a raging stress ball.
CW:
Yeah, that's exactly right. And exercise is a perfect outlet for that to happen. And again, it doesn't have to be intense activity. It can just be a 20 minute yoga flow, a walk, anything, anything will get you kind of moving in that direction.
TU:
So we're talking some of those benefits, some of the effects you talk about relief from stress and different things like that. I know there are just so many more, you got to let you brought like a novel today, of ways that this is going to help you.
CW:
Yeah, I did. I'm very passionate about this topic. Because I think it's something that's very simple that people, it's not simple, because it's really hard to take those first steps. That I know firsthand, but being able to take those first steps and it's free and it's something that really, really can benefit your brain. Trauma is another way that exercise will, and I don't think people always put trauma and exercise together. But there's evidence that suggests that focusing on your body and how it feels while you're exercising can help your nervous system become unstuck and move out of the immobilization stress response of trauma. If you focus on the physical sensations in your joints and muscles and your insides as your body moves, exercises that cross your body or that use all of your limbs are usually best: running, walking, weightlifting, hiking, canoeing, and any of those things that use your limbs are usually the best for those kinds of activities.
TU:
So where will I see the benefits of exercise in my daily life? You know, we talk about getting rid of stress and trauma and all those things. So that's got to have a great impact somewhere else.
CW:
Absolutely. And the thing is, even if you don't suffer from mental health issues, and a lot of people don't, exercise still benefits people in the form of higher self-esteem is one. And when you, when exercise becomes a habit, it can foster your sense of self-worth and make you feel strong and powerful. You'll feel better about how you look maybe, and by meeting even small exercise goals, you'll feel a sense of achievement. I think there's a lot of, unfortunately, people have paired exercise with weight loss and wanting to look better, and that might be like a by-product of it. But exercise is really about your mind. And when I talk about self-esteem, I talk more about, look what you did today. Even if that's sometimes when I started going to the gym, I just, I would just get dressed to go to the gym and I wouldn't even go, but I was really, but I got my clothes on.
CW:
And so that was like a step in the right direction. Right. And I celebrated that, like good for me!
TU:
As you should! It was a step closer.
CW:
Or even, even if it's just getting up at the time that you want to go to the gym eventually, celebrate that. That's a goal. And when you start feeling good about even little goals that helps your self-esteem. You'll sleep better. Even short bursts of exercise in the morning or the afternoon can help regulate sleep patterns. A lot of people feel a burst of energy after exercise. And so it's not super great to do it late at night, but if you did like a yoga flow or something relaxing at night, that's absolutely that will help your sleep. You'll have more energy. Increasing your heart rate several times a week will give you more energy.
CW:
And even for just a few minutes, we're talking five minutes for a walk. It will increase your energy a little bit and get you moving. A lot of times, if you just promise yourself five minutes, more than likely you'll do more than five minutes, because once you get going and the endorphins get moving, the endorphins kind of tell you, 'Hey, this isn't so bad.' Or, 'Oh, my knee doesn't hurt so bad today,' because it does reduce pain. It hits all of those senses with the increased dopamine and serotonin, and it will help boost your immune system and reduce the impact of stress. And so all of those things can be impacted for everyone just by a couple of minutes of exercise a day.
TU:
This is a podcast you can listen to over and over because they're just, there is so much information I do want to ask you before we wrap up though, is there any more I know you could go on forever, because you're so passionate. Any final thoughts on exercise?
CW:
Just, I want to say that, that they are saying about 150 minutes a week is what we should aim for when you're looking at getting the optimal amount of return on your investment, which I think ends up being, I'm bad at math, 30 minutes, five times a week, I think. So if you can commit to 30 minutes, five times a week, but you can, you can break that up into five, 15 minute, five minute, 10 minute, 15 minute bursts. It doesn't have to be 30 minutes all at one time in the day. You can wake up and do 10 minutes. You can do 10 minutes at lunch and then 10 minutes in the evening, just break it up a little bit. When you look at it in smaller chunks, it seems way less daunting than to say, Oh my gosh, 150 minutes in a week. Nope.
TU:
Bite size. Make it bite-size.
CW:
Yep, absolutely.
TU:
So the recliner pulling the handle is not exercise and have to change my workout handle just a little bit.
CW:
If you do it for 10 minutes in a row, Tim.
TU:
Well, once I get, once I get it all stretched out, there's only that one time that I do it and that can last for hours.
CW:
It's basically chair yoga.
TU:
Yeah. Right. Well, I should get credit for pulling the chair back up and, and it's not electric, so I should get credit for that too.
CW:
Agreed!
TU:
Christy Wilkie has been our guest on Mind Your Mind, talking about exercise and movement and on a upcoming podcast, hopefully we will be talking about exercise and healthy eating, putting those two together. Because they go hand in hand and you will feel double the benefit after you've exercised if you're eating right. So thank you so much for the great information. Before we wrap up you know there's always that last question. What do you personally do, Christy, to mind your mind?
CW:
Well, this seems like the optimal place for me to tell you that I run. I run every day. I'm currently training for my first full marathon. I've done seven half marathons. And I started running less than a year ago. That's where we're at.
TU:
This is where I say, wow, because that is amazing. You've got that many half marathons in training for a full marathon in a year. That's pretty amazing.
CW:
Yeah. And I've, and I've never felt better. So that's kind of where my passion comes from for doing this. But yeah, I run and I do yoga every night and I play golf, which I can not wait to get out and hit the links.
TU:
No winter. It's always a good time to go out and golf, right? Christy, thank you again for your time.
CW:
Thank you for having me.
TU:
Thank you for joining us for Mind Your Mind, a podcast presented by Dakota Family Services. You can't have health without behavioral health. Remember to mind your mind. For more information, links to additional resources, contact information, and much more go to dakotafamilyservices.org.
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Humans are hardwired for social connection, but it can be difficult knowing where to fit in as unique individuals. In this episode of Mind Your Mind, host Tim Unsinn and therapist Christy Wilkie talk about the importance of using your strengths, interests, and relationships to figure out where you belong. They also touch on signs that you might not be staying true to yourself, as well as how to handle feelings of being left out.;
While often perceived as only relating to those who’ve experienced warfare, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) can affect anyone. In this special Community Chat episode of Mind Your Mind, Psychologist Dr. Hannah Baczynski and therapist Lucas Mitzel explain what trauma is, how it affects each person differently, and when to seek treatment for trauma-related symptoms. They also discuss different treatment options for PTSD, touching on the pros and cons of each.;
Though autism is one of the most commonly discussed mental health diagnoses in the community, it is often one of the most misunderstood. In this special Community Chat episode of Mind Your Mind, therapists Lucas Mitzel and Falan Johnson discuss what autism is, how it appears in children and adolescents, and how it may look different between individuals. They also touch on how autism can show up differently in boys than in girls and offer intervention tips for parents and caregivers.;
Autism is sometimes perceived as a disorder that only affects children and adolescents, but it is actually a lifelong diagnosis. In this special Community Chat episode of Mind Your Mind, psychologists Dr. Hannah Baczynski and Dr. Megan Spencer explore the symptoms and nuances of autism in adults, touching on the history of autism spectrum disorder, the research surrounding it, how autism commonly presents in adults, and more.;
Though spirituality is often associated with religion, it can mean much more than simply attending religious services or praying. In this episode of Mind Your Mind, host Tim Unsinn and psychiatrist Dr. Wayne Martinsen define spirituality and discuss its relevance in daily life, touching on ways people experience, express, and cultivate spirituality. They also talk about the link between spirituality, religion and meaning in life.;
Setting goals is easy. Working towards them is hard. In this episode of Mind Your Mind, host Tim Unsinn talks with Dakota Family Services therapist Christy Wilkie about how to set healthy, realistic goals, as well as the importance of managing your expectations and staying persistent. Whether you’re starting an exercise routine, writing a book, trying a new diet, or building your career, keep these tips in mind when setting your next big goal.;
Fear is powerful. It can cause us to avoid problems, people, and even opportunities in our life. But it can also be overcome. In this episode of Mind Your Mind, host Tim Unsinn speaks with Falan Johnson, a therapist at Dakota Family Services, about the function of fear and how to face it. Learn where fear comes from, how to identify it, and how to calm down and build confidence when you’re feeling afraid.;
In this episode of Mind Your Mind, our host Tim Unsinn talks with Dakota Family Services therapist Jessie Mertz about the “3 R’s”—Regulate, Relate, and Reason. They discuss what each term means, how they build upon each other, and how this approach can help you calm others who are experiencing distress.;
Schizophrenia is a chronic, complex mental health disorder that affects around 1% of people in the United States. In this episode of Mind Your Mind, host Tim Unsinn and psychiatrist Dr. Wayne Martinsen discuss the symptoms and implications of schizophrenia, touching on its many effects on individual and family life. Learn about how schizophrenia is treated, how it affects physical health, when it tends to develop, and how it is perceived between cultures.;
Although the stigma surrounding mental health is gradually disappearing, it can still be tricky knowing how to talk about it. In this episode of Mind Your Mind, host Tim Unsinn and psychologist Megan Spencer explore how to have a conversation with someone about their mental health, including signs that you should talk to them, how to start the conversation, and some possible reactions to expect from the other person.;
Are you feeling cooped up indoors? Join host Tim Unsinn and therapist Lucas Mitzel in this episode of Mind Your Mind as they discuss the importance of getting outside on your mental health. Learn about the benefits of green and blue spaces, activities you can do while outside, and how being outside can help improve symptoms of different mental health diagnoses.;
In this episode of Mind Your Mind, Tim Unsinn talks with psychologist Dr. Hannah Baczynski about the signs of burnout, how to prevent it, and how to know if your burnout is related to general life stressors or a mental health disorder. They also talk about the difference between fatigue and burnout, as well as how to support yourself and alleviate burnout when you’re experiencing it.;
Many of us know someone who has been diagnosed with a chronic illness, or have been diagnosed with one ourselves. In this episode of Mind Your Mind, host Tim Unsinn talks with therapist April Morris about how chronic illness can impact daily living and mental health, as well as how to seek support if you have been diagnosed with a chronic illness.;
Although the term ‘bipolar’ is sometimes used as slang to describe someone who is moody or indecisive, true bipolar disorder is a complex and sometimes severe mental health disorder that affects the way a person thinks, feels, and behaves. In this episode of Mind Your Mind, host Tim Unsinn discusses bipolar disorder with nurse practitioner Amanda Daggett, touching on what the disorder is, what its symptoms look like, and how it can be treated.;
How much time do you spend each day looking at your phone? An hour or two? Multiple hours? In this episode of Mind Your Mind, host Tim Unsinn meets with therapist Christy Wilkie to discuss how social media use can impact our mental health, relationships, and behavior. Learn tips for monitoring your child’s internet use, as well as how to manage your own time spent on social media.;
While OCD is sometimes perceived as simply a desire to keep things neat and organized, it can actually have much more severe symptoms for those who experience it. In this episode of Mind Your Mind, host Tim Unsinn meets with psychologist Dr. Megan Spencer to talk about who Obsessive Compulsive Disorder affects, what its signs and symptoms are, and how to seek help if you or a loved one has been diagnosed with OCD.;
Bad habits can be easy to start but sometimes very difficult to stop. In this episode of Mind Your Mind, host Tim Unsinn and therapist Falan Johnson talk about breaking bad habits, including where habits come from, how to know if a habit is bad, and steps you can take to stop it.;
Are you looking for some help on your mental health journey? In this episode of Mind Your Mind, host Tim Unsinn and therapist Jessie Mertz talk about how to find a therapist, including what you should know when searching and what questions to ask when you meet a therapist for the first time. They also touch on what the letters after a therapist’s name mean, and how they apply to the type of services or treatment you might be looking for.;
Whether it’s from asking someone on a date or applying for a job, we all experience rejection at some point in our lives. In this episode of Mind Your Mind, host Tim Unsinn talks with therapist April Morris about how to cope with rejection, including the common coping stages, the importance of acceptance, and how rejection can impact people differently.;
Like other personality disorders, borderline personality disorder is a commonly misunderstood and stigmatized mental illness. In this episode of Mind Your Mind, host Tim Unsinn talks with Lucas Mitzel, a therapist at Dakota Family Services, about what BPD is, how it affects someone’s behavior, and where to seek treatment if your child has been diagnosed with BPD.;
Do you think you might be suffering from an undiagnosed mental disorder? If so, a psychological assessment might be able to help. In this episode of Mind Your Mind, psychologist Dr. Hannah Baczynski and host Tim Unsinn talk about what to expect from a psychological assessment, including what an assessment might include, what information you might receive from the psychologist, and what you should communicate with your psychologist before and after receiving an assessment.;
In this episode of Mind Your Mind, host Tim Unsinn and Amanda Daggett explore the topic of using supplements for mental health. In addition to talking about some of the most commonly used supplements like melatonin and St. John’s Wort, they also discuss the benefits, the risks, and the research surrounding various supplements.;
Feeling like you’ve got the winter blues? If you’re noticing symptoms of depression with the change of seasons, it may be a sign that you’re suffering from Seasonal Affective Disorder, or SAD. In this special Community Chat episode of Mind Your Mind, therapists Christy Wilkie and Lucas Mitzel discuss the common symptoms of Seasonal Affective Disorder, how it can affect other mental health disorders, and some useful tips, tricks, and resources for managing symptoms of SAD.;
Join Christy and Lucas, therapists at Dakota Family Services, as they share practical tips for building confidence when trying new things. From managing self-doubt to building resilience, this episode will empower you to approach new experiences with a positive mindset.;
In this episode, Christy and Lucas explore why relationships can be so hard. Join them as they discuss the characteristics of both healthy and toxic relationships, talk about the difference between normal conflict and abuse, and help you discover your love languages so you and your partner can best express your love to each other.;
In this episode, Christy and Lucas explore anxiety. Join them as they discuss the signs and symptoms of an anxiety disorder, what you can do to decrease your anxiety, and how to best help loved ones struggling with anxiety.;
In this episode, Christy and Lucas explore depression. Join them as they discuss the signs and symptoms of Major Depressive Disorder, what you can do to help yourself feel better, and what you can do to help your loved ones. They will talk about coping strategies, therapy interventions, and ways to help you identify when your child might need extra help.;
Change is inevitable. Join Christy and Lucas as they explore big and small changes and how they impact you. Learn why change can be so hard, even good change, and discover ways to manage it effectively.;
In this episode of "Is It Just Me," Christy and Lucas discuss the very important topic of suicide. Listen to learn about risk factors, warning signs, and what you can do to help a loved one who is struggling. Remember, you are not alone. If you need immediate assistance, call 911. If you need to talk to someone, call the Suicide and Crisis Lifeline at 988.;
Join Lucas and Christy as they explore the power of spending time outdoors on mental and emotional well-being. Discover practical tips, personal anecdotes, and expert insights on the benefits of getting outside and reconnecting with nature.;
In this episode of "Is It Just Me?" Lucas and Christy discuss ADHD, shedding light on its prevalence and impact on daily life. Learn practical strategies for managing symptoms and understand why your friend or loved one with ADHD does the things they do.;
In this episode of "Is It Just Me?", join our hosts Christy and Lucas as they delve into the complex relationship between the internet and mental health. With the digital age bringing information and social connections to our fingertips, it also presents unique challenges and opportunities for our safety and psychological well-being.;
In this episode of "Is It Just Me?", Christy and Lucas discuss how common it is for people to see themselves differently from others. Using their own personal triumphs and challenges as examples, they outline the things that shape our self-esteem. Additionally, they share simple daily practices to help listeners recognize and celebrate their own personal victories. This episode is filled with tips and engaging stories aimed at encouraging listeners to undertake challenges that foster self-growth and personal confidence.;
In this episode of "Is It Just Me," Lucas and Christy talk about what it's like to begin therapy. Feeling apprehensive about starting therapy is normal, but surmountable. Together, Lucas and Christy unravel common myths about therapy and emphasize the role of therapy in disrupting negative life patterns and routines that are no longer serving you.;
In the latest episode of “Is It Just Me?” Christy and Lucas tackle the transition from leisurely summer days to structured school schedules with warmth and wisdom. This episode is a must-listen for parents seeking guidance and strategies to help navigate the shift with confidence. Learn how to handle changes in routine, the importance of communication, and strategies to help the entire family adjust to and embrace the new normal. Listening to this episode can be your first step toward making back-to-school a season of growth and positive change for all.;
In this month’s episode of the "Is It Just Me?" podcast, Lucas Mitzel and Christy Wilkie, Dakota Family Services, dive into the complexities of trauma and its therapy. The episode sheds light on Trauma-Focused Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (TF-CBT) and the importance of creating a trauma narrative as a cornerstone of healing. The thoughtful discussions aim to educate listeners on the intricacies of trauma, the innovative methods used in therapy, and the role of caregivers in the recovery process. Through expert insights and compassionate storytelling, Lucas and Christy provide practical advice and real-world examples for individuals who have experienced trauma.;
In this episode of “Is It Just Me?”, Lucas and Christy delve into the world of mindfulness and relaxation techniques. From body scans to mindfulness exercises, they provide a soothing experience to help you unwind and distress. Discover practical tips and advice on incorporating mindfulness into your daily routine and learn how to prioritize mental well-being in today's fast-paced world.;
In this special additional episode of “Is It Just Me” join therapist Lucas Mitzel as he gives listeners a transformative journey within their own body and mind. In this episode, Lucas guides listeners through a soothing body scan to promote calm, mindfulness, and inner peace. This episode offers a unique mixdown of gentle narration, and relaxation techniques, leaving you feeling refreshed, rejuvenated, and more connected to yourself.;